Sender: percyshelley Can Spring Be Far Behind@rygh , Area: Joke Title: [Advanced edition] The scorching sun and the pig-headed slowdown are combined from February to May. Sending site: Shuimu Community Wed Aug 1 17:09:17 2012 , within the site The sun is blazing and the pig's head is slacking off at work. ,リ February to May combined issue 丿 ^ ; フ , , ノ ハ ' , 乀 , " :: ノ ィ丿; : : " ; ソ レ乀丿; " ' ; " ; ; " ^ ノ PART I MMjoke ' Go ahead http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 1 2丿 It turns out that this is what the words in the scientific research literature mean, リ http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 1 6 Math otaku is so awesome http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 1 9丿 Perpetual motion machine finally realized ;フ http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 2 3 乀 ハ Brother was teased http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 2 4 , 乀 Finally I understand why some people’s clothes get dirty easily and some people’s shoes get dirty easily ㄏ :: ノ http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 2 5 ィ丿; Monsters that often appear in the toilet in the middle of the night http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 2 8; " 01 ^ ノ PART I MMjoke ' Something you drew makes me want to die series www.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 120490?s 120490 丿 Share the prince’s old work Journey to the West, リ http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 3 9 TW Traditional Chinese http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 13 4 1 俿 ; フ 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 02 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Doctors' funny jokes churchilllee zz by AaYaYa丿 1. Push the patient to the operating room with your classmates for surgery. Next door is the orthopedic surgery and electric saw. The sounds made by electric drills and other equipment come and go one after another. Hey, hey, the patient asked me, doctor, what's going on next door? I'm doing renovations. I have black lines all over my head. Should I tell him that I'm having surgery? ; フ 3. During my internship at the hospital the year before last, I admitted n rectal cancer patients in a row and had the main treatment at hand 乀 ハ On the stage, he sighed with emotion, "We are collecting money from people and blowing people's anus." , 乀 4. On the front of our hospital’s admission certificate, the doctor fills in the patient’s basic information, and on the back, the doctor fills in the patient’s basic information ㄏ :: ノ Fill in the contact information and contact relationship, etc. One day we will send ィ丿; I found that the relationship column on the back of an admission certificate said "husband and wife relationship". Existence or death; 8. Decided to create a knowledge website for Parkinson’s patients in order to care for patients I plan to apply for the domain name www.pppaaarrrkkkiiinnnsssooonn " 03 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Doctors' funny jokes 丿 Continued from previous page, リ n .cc In this way, even if the patient has severe resting tremor Able to complete URL input 丿 9. I had just finished taking the medical skills test and went to take the physical examination. I watched the doctor say; フ I took my blood pressure. I was really worried about his unprofessionalism. After thinking about it again and again, I decided to help him. He grabbed it and tried to sit up straighter so that my elbows and my heart dirty at the same level, 乀 ㄏ :: ノ 10. The city randomly checked medical records. Orthopedics was notorious for organizing postgraduate students in general medicine; I spent the whole night revising the 15 selected medical records and after submitting them, the hospital department read a few pages. Then I returned them all. The one that said "Diagnosis: High Paraplegia, Physical Examination"; Walk into the ward in a clear and energetic state 11. Psychiatric examinations mainly rely on questions and answers. One of the regular questions is "Chicken" 04 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Doctors' funny jokes 丿 Continued from previous page, リ What is the difference between a chicken and a duck? A patient once answered that chickens are female and ducks are male. What's even worse is that the attending doctor turned around and said to the resident, "This person is not the same person." Forgot to check for HIV? ; フ 16. Pediatric surgery: The school girl took off the male patient’s pants after taking the stage. 乀 ハ The boy covered his lower body and shouted, "You bad guys, take off my pants." I want my mother. The school girl replied, "Little brother, don't make trouble. My sister has seen her before." Bigger than you ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; 18. A certain cardiologist described the duty situation in their department: doing sit-ups until your abdominal muscles come out; 19. A friend once worked as a medical director at Shanghai Sixth People’s Hospital. One day The woman asked me what kind of medical treatment I should go to when I was pregnant, while my friend was hesitating." 05 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Doctors' funny jokes 丿 Continued from previous page, リ The experienced nurse nearby answered: Those who want children should go to the obstetrics department, and those who don’t want children should go to the obstetrics department. Go to gynecology department 丿 20. When I was young, my parents often threatened me if I didn’t study well and grow up; フ I was asked to pick out feces, so I studied hard and finally became a general surgeon 乀 ハ Health, but whenever I face patients with intestinal obstruction, I always feel that I am still a Those who dig out feces, 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 06 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Just now my daughter was playing a game with the neighbor’s sister ljli丿 Guoguo plays with her neighbor’s sister. The three of them fight over the Ipad to play Angry Birds, リ It is stipulated that three people use the back of their palms to decide who plays. Whoever is different wins. If you win, play a round. It turns out that Guoguo can only shoot with the back of her hand, and my sister can only shoot with the center of her hand. So the neighbor’s sister suffered a tragedy. ; フ 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 07 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' You are so stupid that you don’t have male or female friends plax zz by harmonistic 丿 In the middle of the night on Valentine's Day, an interesting topic suddenly occurred to me and I got up from my sleep, リ Write about it Girl, why don’t you have a boyfriend? January is the winter vacation and I buy a ticket to go home. Little A asks fellow seniors to buy it for me and treat me to a meal; フ Xie, after two visits, the senior became my boyfriend 乀 ハ In January, during the winter vacation, you go to the station to line up in the middle of the night, and then nothing happens. After, 乀 February Class Reunion, Little B’s relationship with the male classmate whom she had an affair with back then ㄏ :: ノ An old classmate becomes a boyfriend ィ丿; In February, you helped your mother do hygiene at home and then nothing happened. School started in March, and Little C dressed up beautifully and went to self-study; A man who studied in the same classroom every day became her boyfriend In March, you went to self-study with your roommate, unkempt, and then nothing happened. It's over" 08 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' You are so stupid that you don’t have male or female friends Continuing from above In April, spring is warm and flowers are blooming. Little D participates in a BBS forum and the forum friend becomes her boyfriend. リ April, you have been BBS diving for many years, and then there is no more During the Golden Week in May, Xiao E participated in a travel group formed by online travel friends. Then he became a boyfriend In May, you stayed in the dormitory watching anime and then there was no more; フ June final exam. Little F seeks tutoring from science students who are strong in mathematics to prepare for the exam. 乀 ハ Temporary tutor becomes boyfriend June, you stayed up all Sunday night by yourself, and then there was nothing more, 乀 In July, I changed dormitories and had to move. Little G asked a male classmate to help me and asked him to buy me a meal as a thank you. ㄏ :: ノ The porter became her boyfriend ィ丿; Changing dormitories and moving in July. It’s hard to figure out how to make anyone take the trouble on a hot day. It means that after I finished moving, there will be no more; August Summer Internship. Xiao H made friends with his seniors who helped him a lot in his work. Senior becomes boyfriend In August, you stayed at home and watched anime again, and then there was no more." 09 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' You are so stupid that you don’t have male or female friends Continuing from above In September, the new school year came. Xiao I joined the Photography Association and took photos as a model. リ Photographer becomes boyfriend In September, you joined the film association and sat in the classroom to watch a movie every week. After, there will be no more. 丿 In October, when installing the network, Xiao J asked a classmate who knew computers to help. IT man Suicheng; フ boyfriend 乀 ハ In October, your computer crashed. You borrowed your roommate’s computer to answer questions on Baidu and searched for the disk yourself. Reinstall the system and then nothing happens again, 乀 In November, Xiao K posted a message saying that he didn’t want to celebrate Singles’ Day, and the netizen became her boyfriend ㄏ :: ノ In November, you posted a message saying that you were fine alone, and then nothing happened. ィ丿; It's over In December, Little L took the opportunity of Christmas to give a gift to a male classmate whom he had been in love with for a long time; Classmate becomes boyfriend In December, you save up money and go out to have sex with your roommate, and then nothing happens. It's over" 10 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' You are so stupid that you don’t have male or female friends Continuing from above Brother, why don’t you have a girlfriend? In January, your classmate went to buy tickets for the junior girl. You were playing DOTA and Warcraft in the dormitory. In February, you went to the class reunion and you played DOTA and Warcraft at home. In March, your classmates went to study hall. You played DOTA and Warcraft in the dormitory. In April, your classmates got together and you played DOTA World of Warcraft in the dormitory; フ In May, your classmates went on a trip and you played DOTA and Warcraft in the dormitory 乀 ハ In June, your classmate went to help the girl with her homework. You played DOTA in the dormitory. beast , 乀 In July, your classmate helped the girl move, and you were playing DOTA and Warcraft in the dormitory ㄏ :: ノ In August, your classmate went on a summer internship and you played DOTA and Warcraft at home; In September, you went to the club activities of your classmates and you played DOTA and Warcraft in the dormitory. In October, your classmate went to help the girl repair her computer. You were playing DOTA and World of Warcraft in the dormitory; In November, your classmate went on a date with an online friend and you were playing DOTA and Warcraft in the dormitory. In December, your classmate went to spend Christmas with his girl. You played DOTA in the dormitory. beast " 11 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Design hair style renhe6400 丿 When a colleague went to get a haircut, he met a very eloquent barber and said to him, buddy, リ If you believe me, don’t get a haircut for half a year and keep it, then I will design one for you. His hairstyle is absolutely stunning. His colleagues believed him. He usually has a buzz cut for half a year. Over time, his hairstyle has lost its human look. It’s finally time to get a haircut. I was told by my boss that the man was fired because he said to everyone he met, “Brother” ; フ Trust me once and come back to me in half a year. 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 12 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' The second senior brother is no more, the final season maquefei zz by MeizuMX丿 I'm wondering whether this should be told in flashback or in forward order. It's fun, リ By the way, the second senior brother went through the century to express his love on Singles’ Day and 2012 New Year’s Day. Confession on Valentine’s Day, but I was helpless and the senior sister cleverly changed the topic every time. Ever since The second senior brother, who became more and more courageous with every setback, confessed his love again on February 29th, which happens only once every four years. Nianniao, senior sister did not change the subject this time, but said seriously that if he ; フ If she can stop asking everyone to call him "Second Senior Brother", she will agree. The above is just information I inquired about afterwards. LZ did not hear it with my own ears. The second senior brother is such an honest young man. He didn’t think of any way, but just, 乀 I told everyone straightforwardly not to call him Second Senior Brother anymore, so ㄏ :: ノ Passerby A: Why? I’m used to it. ィ丿; Second senior brother, I am the second senior brother, then she is the second sister-in-law. It doesn’t sound good. Passerby B: Okay, for the sake of Second Senior Brother’s happiness, we won’t scream; We endured it for a day and stopped calling him Second Senior Brother, so on the 2nd they held hands. It's just that the second senior brother no longer exists, but on the 2nd, I will go to school My sister got a new name, "Second Sister-in-law" END 13 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' XX version in the eyes of XX version lastblade zz by pdp丿 express plaque home version worklife joke ,リ Express Elite Fifty Cent Aunt Liar Academic 丿 plaque cents elite aunt coder academic ; フ 乀 ハ Home Edition Brain Damage Different Dimension Elite Phoenix Man Academic , 乀 WL Luther Luther Aunt Luther Elite Academic ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; joke, pretend to be 13, pretend to be 13, big sister, pretend to be 13, academic ; " 14 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Loading... credy丿 I don’t know who the fool posted a post with only one sentence, リ Loading...丿 ; フ 乀 ハ It’s so embarrassing that I had to wait for more than half an hour to review the post. , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 15 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Dude, you cheated me to death. MITdreaming丿 My former roommates were a pair of handsome Russian and Belarusian beauties, who were once in love with each other, リ The country is very interested in learning Chinese with me and buying chopsticks. I have fun and keep teaching them. I taught Sichuan dialect for half a year without telling them what was going on. Later I After I left, I sent them a DVD of Crazy Stone and asked them to follow it. Learn the comparative pronunciation of each word. Later, the handsome guy went to Google; フ work 乀 ハ Fifteen minutes ago, the handsome white guy called me and scolded me, saying that he was going to discuss business with HTC. As a result, no one on the other side understood the Chinese he spoke, and he used ordinary Chinese words in a clear and round tone, 乀 Tell me, man, you cheated on me and put the phone away ㄏ :: ノ LOL ィ丿 ; ; " 16 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' The powerful subtitle team reappears the bravery qtz丿 Who translated We Found Love into Weifang's love? The subtitle group has started, リ Entering the field of lyrics translation yesterday once more What is Jesus’ father doing? wake me up when september end sleep until National Day 丿 cry in the party I cried as soon as I joined the party ; フ There is also 乀ハ who translated Aung San Suu Kyi into Anshan Secretary , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 17 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Brother, take the subway wundg丿 @Qichenyi I was taking the subway, and there was a strange aunt sitting next to me, and my phone rang, リ The aunt answered the phone and said to the phone very cheerfully, "Ah, I don't have any tonight." Kong'er, my car broke down and I was taking the subway. I found a handsome guy and I'm going to drive it. The crowded carriage was quiet for a moment. I glanced at the aunt next to me. When I turned around, I found that everyone in the car was staring at me; フ 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 18 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' This is how cups are made ila丿 When I was young, I was short and light, so I was bored all day long. Go under the big sofa at home and wait for your family to get off work After a while, my dad passed by the sofa after get off work. I stretched out a hand and grabbed it like lightning. His ankle made a loud cry. You know, so he Dad was so angry that he reached out and grabbed me out from under the sofa; フ GC is here. I thought he was going to beat me. Unexpectedly, he grabbed me, dad. 乀 ハ After a pause of about 10 seconds, he stuffed me back under the sofa and told me seriously. Your mother will get off work later. Come again and guide me. When I reach out, 乀 Hurry up and wait until she sits down on the sofa before you catch her ㄏ :: ノ 10 minutes later, another scream echoed in my house. You ィ丿; we understand I won’t tell you that my mother took turns whipping me and me with a feather duster all over the house; my dad " 19 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Fate may be in the code comments oikomi丿 A former colleague in the company was low-key and not good at expressing himself. After leaving my job, I found out that he developed There is XXX in a module comment, I love U XXX is the testing department I was very touched and told that girl. Later they were together Later I found this comment in other modules he developed. But the test girls all have different names ;フ 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " 20 ^ ノ PART II Joke ' [Playing coldly] A GG was looking for Tsinghua University and got lost unexpectedly. ghostzb丿 I was looking for Tsinghua University, but I got lost. Fortunately, I met a gentleman, リ An elderly female professor holding several thick books. How can I get to Tsinghua University? go to university The elderly female professor thought for a while and said seriously: Someone told me at the beginning I study. Only by studying hard can you go to Tsinghua University; フ It makes sense 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " twenty one ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Reason for leaving Laysia丿 Someone wrote that I have a bad stomach and can’t digest the cakes drawn by the boss, リ 丿 ; フ 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " twenty two ^ ノ PART II Joke ' Dimensionality reduction is the most awesome and creative attack method I have ever seen. aurox zz by klglfgljl丿 There are also anti-dimensionality reduction attacks. According to reliable records, Ma Liang, the magic pen, used this. murder of a government official 丿 ; フ 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " twenty three ^ ノ PART II Joke ' The link between T University and P University is buybyebyezz by pdp丿 TPlink,リ 丿 ; フ 乀 ハ , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; " twenty four ^ ノ PART III Little Dark Room ' Occasional subway amosryan丿 As soon as I enter the small dark room, I don’t think about JOKE Shu, リ Sometimes JOKE appears inadvertently It would have been better to take a photo of this porridge bar. Alas, I took out my hand that day. When the machine arrived, the subway started moving. This is my first time painting, so I need to take a photo ;フ 乀 ハ This is the subway window in front of me. The upper part , 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; ; This is the wall advertisement behind the car window, of course, the small part in the upper right corner. " 25 ^ ノ PART III Little Dark Room ' Occasional subway Continued from previous page ,リ Jingbei Shen Jing 丿 ; フ You know what I'm going to say? Na Ni I don't know 乀 ハ Alas, the truth is like this. The proportions in the painting are not very good. It’s probably because of the sauce. Purple Bar, 乀 ㄏ :: ノ ィ丿; God Kyo; I really don’t have the FD mentality to say that. " 26 ^ ノ PART III Little Dark Room ' Let me share two smiling words about snakes today. yutourr丿 #微 fable# There was a big mountain in front of Yu Gong’s house. Yu Gong thought it was in the way and took his descendants with him. When he wanted to move the mountain, Hequ Zhisou stopped him and said, "If you can't move it, there will be a big disaster." Foolish Old Man refused to listen and thought that as long as he persevered, he could move the mountain. Those who are determined It finally happened. The day finally came when the mountain was completely removed. Yugong had tears in his eyes.丿 Suddenly there was an explosion and a snake emerged from the ground. Laughing. Hahaha. Damn it; フ The calabash baby, I’m out. 乀 ハ #microreligion# On the sixth day of creation, Jehovah created Adam. Adam was tempted by the serpent, 乀 Confused, I felt depressed, so I complained to Jehovah. I was alone ㄏ :: ノ Lonely I want company I want the forbidden fruit of Eden says the Lord ィ丿 ; This was easy to handle, so he took away one of Adam's kidneys and gave Adam an apple. fruit ; " 27 ^ ノ PART IV About the major delay in this monthly publication ' Blacklist of responsible persons 丿 ,リ TOP SECRET Coercion, accomplice, principal offender ; フ MMjoke ap9 A temporary worker, Zhutou is 乀 ハ An all-out search is underway, trying to capture everything Joke FZD, please give an explanation to the moderators, 乀 ㄏ :: ノ Little Black Room FZD ィ丿 ; wall painter percyshelley; " 28