Sender: FZD Anti-collision pier, Qiang Ye wins the ancestral line, I love Mu Pig, letter area: Joke Title: [Monthly] Yangliu Yiyi’s April issue Sending site: Shuimu Community Sun May 9 14:37:28 2010 , within the site , " ; , , , Yang willow, according to according to ' of , , Four moon " journal , [PIC] A gift for my girlfriend’s third anniversary zz Reprinted by tesing , http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 5 1014 27 ; , [PIC] Cushion Meerkat by VampireJax http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 5 1014 25 , [PIC]Transformers by sha, http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 5 1014 24 ' [PIC] Taiping Rebellion Reprinted by gcat http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 5 1014 23 [PIC]laughed to death Reposted by crowyue " http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 5 1014 31 [PIC]This is pretty good, right? by Ryn http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 5 1014 29 , , , , , , , " MMJoke " , , " , , " , , " , 1 , ﹢The sorrow of men majoring in science and engineering, bhre , ; , I just had dinner with a friend from the financial industry and he said that I just gave my daughter away A friend of mine has a 2,000 euro bag and she likes it very much. Women are really hard to raise these days. , I'm very depressed. No wonder I don't have a girlfriend. I can just give him 2,000 euros. The resistance , ' " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 2 , ﹢The street idiot jj I met yesterday, sailinghippo , ; , Yesterday afternoon I met a driving sister near the East Gate and asked for directions. How to get to the Life Sciences Building? After talking for a long time, I didn’t know which building it was in. She said that a teacher told her to let her, I don’t know exactly where it came from. I said you call him and ask him what his name is. After he dialed the number, it seemed that he was still on the phone, will not understand I said give me your phone and I asked ' Then I told the teacher that I just entered the East Gate. What do you think the place is called? a move Over there, is it the east gate on Chengfu Road? I'd say that's right. They say you can see the library after entering the east gate. I don't think so. The library is far away." The other side was speechless for two seconds and said that they could find a table tennis hall. I said no, table tennis. The arena is further away The teacher over there responded quickly. She is not in Tsinghua University. I said yes. Then let her come to Peking University I looked at the sister in the car again. She was still looking at me blankly. , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 3 , ﹢Spare tire and blind date joke original, SundayMore , ; , Spare tire joke one A certain girl has a pretty face and has many suitors, but she is not a cruel master. Son, we all joked that she was hoarding spare tires and she just laughed and joked. Say, yes, yes, do you want to suggest me to use an excel table to manage it? ah , Everyone was stunned. One of my friends had a sharp remark and everyone burst into laughter. ' He said Well, this table can name those fetuses.xls " Spare tire joke 2 A certain sister and a classmate of hers called each other buddies and sisters, but their relationship was quite ambiguous. People suspect that the two of them are each other's spare tire. A certain sharp-tongued brother is best to inquire about gossip. Ask frequently. Asked if there was any latest progress on the situation, a certain mm was very sweaty and said she hadn’t heard from her for a long time. The sharp-tongued brother gave his judgment and encouraged him frequently. He still had time to spare. , , , , , [continue to next page] , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 4 , If you don’t cheer me up, there’s no chance for me to watch. , ; , Invite you to dinner on a blind date A certain older sister finally got married. The wedding banquet was very luxurious. I guess she wants to clean it up. In recent years, blind dates have been despised, There were 3 tables arranged for the wedding banquet, and then the special organizer said that these three tables should not receive bride price. money , After the wedding banquet started, I discovered that the people at the table were all boys and they seemed to be strangers to each other. ' Later, when the newlyweds were toasting, the bride arrived at the three tables and said bitterly, "Everyone." Handsome guys, thank you for being invited on a blind date. It was you who invited me to dinner. See you. Once and for all, I don’t even have a chance to invite you back. Here today, I I've invited you back in one go. Thank you very much." , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 5 , ﹢An embarrassing thing, lucky0709 , ; , I was on the bus one day. There were very few people on the bus. I was holding a baby in the front seat. A very beautiful baby. I played with the baby there for a long time. Finally, he looked back at me and the baby turned his head. She vomited. She vomited all over her body and on the floor. Her mother wiped it and thought to herself, why did she suddenly vomit? There's a soundtrack next to it, just because I looked at you one more time in the crowd, ' That embarrassment of mine " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 6 , ﹢Moonlight tribe raises dogs, levi , ; , , A fellow moonlight tribe member raised a dog and expressed the following sentiments: I eat whatever the dog eats at the beginning of the month. I eat whatever the dog eats at the end of the month. ' " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 7 , ﹢Go to the swimming pool today, Scateu , ; , Tuck your legs, turn your feet, kick your feet, catch water, float..., Collect, turn, pedal, clip and float... Collect, turn, pedal and drink... , Close, turn, push, clip and drink... Close and drink... ' Collect and drink... drink ... drink... drink.... " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 8 , ﹢Advertising breaks, kaola , ; , 在某地旅游 忽然前方出现大量羊群 俺一时亢奋过 , 度 手指羊群却想不到什么良好的词汇 于是高喊 , 羊 羊 ' 羊 回头发现众人默然 " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 9 , ﹢想当年 俺也做过车模 , BeArwen , ; , 先申明是个标题党... 有一年车展我去兼职打工了 我的工作是跟车模站在一起 , 只是立足点不一样 她们的立足点在台上 我的立足点在台下 我是擦奔驰车滴 当年俺穿着黑灰相间的肥大防雨服 土得掉渣 , ...车展人那个多啊 那个挤啊 那个热啊 那个闷啊 ' 奔驰车请了几个模特 但是她们不常出来 隔半天才出来一 次 于是那些拿着象鼻子的兄弟们都巴巴的站在那里等着 突然 出来一个模特 人群立马拥过去 噼里啪啦一阵闪光灯 " 话说当时有个好朋友好心来看望我 虽然他口头这么说 但 肯定不是专程来看我的 哪有看好朋友带象鼻子来的 他转到 我这里的时候 已经激动得舌头都屡不直了 那个 那个lotus 的美驴只穿了仨点 什么热辣啦的造型都摆 我我我 我拍了好 多 多 多 他慢慢地停下来了 因为注意到我汗流浃背土里土 , , , , , [转下页] , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 10 , 气站在那里 一脸倒霉相 于是很同情的说 , , 天天擦这个车有感情了吧 来我帮你跟它合张影吧 ; , 我说好 于是 他隔得远远的用他的象鼻子给我拍了张照片 随着他 , 的闪光灯一闪 大量的闪光灯开始冲我闪 一大堆人群向我涌 来 妈呀 吓得我腿都软了 , 虽然他们发现错误悻悻地散了 但是俺至今还在回味 想当 ' 年 俺也做过车模... 呃 这个很难写得搞笑 大家表拍我 哈哈 " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 11 , ﹢幽默到让人无语的老爸 原创 , SundayMore , ; , 老爸很幽默 冷幽默到让人很无语 偶尔很毒舌 但 是确是个真真切切疼爱自己闺女的好爸爸 我跟老爸经常 逗乐子 老妈在一旁乐的不行 , 可乐事之一 今年过年回家 家里急着催我找对象 , 我一边跟他们说深圳有多少优秀单身剩女 一边跟他们 痛 陈 深圳的适龄男青年数量少 他们要求高 讲到激动时 竟然 ' 跌落了几滴眼泪 老爸看着我 心疼的说 好闺女 难为你了 咱不找对象 了 赶明儿爸给你买一个 我一下子乐了 " 前两天 老妈给我打电话又在催我找对象的事儿 我一下子想起老爸的话 就打趣地说 我爸呢 我爸说给 我买的对象呢 过了几秒 老爸抢过电话来 幽幽的说 我去问了 说现 在没货 , , , , , [转下页] , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 12 , 我 您上哪去问的呀 , 又是停顿了好几秒 , 老爸又幽幽的说 淘宝 ; , 哐当 真让人无语到倾倒 可乐事之二 爸爸打电话来说我给他在当当定的书收到了 给老妈寄的东 , 西也收到了 我自豪而撒娇的说 爸爸 你有这么一个乖女儿 每个月 , 都给你买书 给你和妈妈买东西寄回来 你一天到晚在同事们的 羡慕眼神下签收不用付费的包裹 是不是很开心啊 ' 老爸淡定而冷淡的说 恩 很开心 就跟我每个月花几百 块钱买彩票 偶尔中个五块十块的奖一样开心 哐当 真让人无语到倾倒 " 我气得哼哧哼哧了 然后听到老妈在那边狂乐 , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 13 , ﹢童言无忌 , happyvoice , ; , 新认识了一个mv老师 在小学教美术 从mv那里收获 小学生的joke若干 , 一 陪mv逛街时 发现她对衣服款式比较在意 吊带或稍微暴露 , 一点的统统无视 于是我问她 学校是否对教师的衣着有要求 ' 她说学校没有明文规定 但是上周开运动会 她带小朋友们 参加 穿的是低腰牛仔裤 弯腰的时候听到有小朋友大喊 谭老 师屁股露出来啦 !!! " 二 班上有个小女孩戴了个小吊坠 是她的属相 谭老师想逗逗 她 问 这是什么啊 , , , , , [转下页] , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 14 , 小女孩一脸严肃地说 这是爸爸买的 可贵了 要二 , 十多块钱呢 妈妈说了 绝对不能弄丢 就算别人拿薯片 , 来换也不行 ; , 谭老师问 要是我用十袋薯片换呢 小女孩认真考虑了一下 说 那也不行 , 三 , 班上有个小男孩 外地来的 家里做瓷砖生意 谭老师问 你家瓷砖多少钱一块啊 ' 小男孩答 有三块的 四块的 五块的 谭老师问 要是我去你家买瓷砖 给打折吗 小男孩十分坚决 不打折 我家的瓷砖都不打折 谭老师假装不高兴 说 嗯 谭老师去买也不打折啊 " 小男孩看老师不高兴了 说 那我回去问问吧 谭老师继续逗他 好 你去问问 五块钱的瓷砖能不能三块 钱卖给我 小男孩说 不行 三块钱的瓷砖都卖完了 , , , , , [转下页] , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 15 , 四 , 小朋友们学习了 望庐山瀑布 之后 语文考试有这 , 么一道题 ; , 你想对李白说什么 你想对庐山说什么 你想对瀑布 说什么 答案如下 , 你想对李白说什么 啊 你真棒 , 你想对庐山说什么 真是太神奇了 ' 你想对瀑布说什么 那么多水是从哪里流出来的啊 " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 16 , ﹢ 这辈子见过的最诚实的清华女生 后传 , higuys , ; , 那篇贴子自从在水木joke上发出来后 Google宣布离开中国 泰国红杉军倾巢出动 , 地球震了好几个地方 冰岛火山喷发了 , 严正声明 以上事件与那个贴子无关 以下事件与本贴有关 ' 在**网上被疯狂转贴 上了**弹出窗口的首页 数个相关人员受到不同程度的干扰 如 " 1 发出贴子的第二天 还未起床 收到短信 快看 我成了 水木十大榜首的女2号了 呃 , , , , , [转下页] , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 17 , 2 昨日在水木发我们公司的招聘贴子 有人回复 , 这是被清华MM调戏的那个公司吗 , 呃 ; , 3 At 2 o'clock in the morning, I received an email from a VC in Shanghai asking me to do business. business plan, Received reply at 2:30 am Why is there no such person among your partners? real girls, Well ' 4 GF sent a text message, does she like you? Didn't reply to her Sent another text message, do you like her? Well " 5 The salesperson went to discuss the group buying business and the other party gave us a 20% discount. The requirement must be 20% off. on our website Salesman, how do we make money? Merchants, are you still making money? , , , , , [continue to next page] , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 18 , Salesman uh, Businessmen, you don’t spend money to hire Tsinghua students. Where do you spend your money? , ; , Well 6 The phone rings, Hello, this is *** I want to make a group purchase of your product. You can just click Buy Can you tell me the purchase price?' Sorry, I can't disclose this Then let your honest girl answer the phone Well " , , , , , , , , ", Joke " , , " , , " , , " , 19 , ﹢Math teacher joke 2, dloot , ; , 1 Talking about graph theory, talking about trees, the teacher said There is a concept in a branch of graph theory called caterpillar, which is this kind of thing. structural The teacher draws on the blackboard, < < < < < < < < < < < And then goes on to say that a tree that conforms to certain properties is called graceful and one of them is ' The theorem is called Caterpillars are graceful. Everyone laughs. I searched online today and sure enough there are mathematical papers on this topic. " The following is not strictly a teacher’s quotation. 2 When talking about the ring ideal domain, I suddenly found that it can actually be connected. People who live in the 5th Ring Road hope to have suites in the 4th Ring Road, 3rd Ring Road, and houses in the 4th Ring Road. , , , , , [continue to next page] , , , ", black house" , , " , , " , , " , 20, Everyone hopes to have a house in Ring 3 or Ring 2, so Ring 4, Ring 3, or Ring 2 is, The ideal of five rings. Three rings. Two rings are the ideal of four rings. Two rings are the ideal of three rings. Four rings. , the great ideal of 5 rings; , 3, In the last class, I finally realized the true meaning of this course. The Black Room Theory is here. This lesson laid the theoretical foundation, as follows Def ' Let H be a set H {The i-th order black room i belongs to the integer set Z} Among them, when i 1, the first-order black room is referred to as the black room. When i 0, the black room of level 0 is referred to as joke " It is easy to know that H is an infinite set and a countable set Define two unary operations on H operation grab raise Catch the i-th level black room and the i-1st level black room Kick the i-th level black room i-1st level black room So the grab and kick operation is closed to H , , , , , [continue to next page] , , , ", black house" , , " , , " , , " , 21, So H, grab, kick is an algebraic system, black room system , ; , TH black room system is from Tudou Proof: It can be known from the grab and kick operation that for any element i in H There is a path to the i-th order black room and a path to the i-th order black room. There are only two paths, so the degree of each node of H is 2, which is even. number, so the graph composed of H and its edges is an even graph, so H, grab, and kick are even graphs, that is, The black room system is from Illustration # Cor joke system is puppet' Proof " , , , , , , , , ", black house" , , " , , " , , " , 22, ﹢Then I will tell a joke to the baby in the little dark room, stoney , ; , The day before yesterday at the high school class reunion, I talked about something We had to practice in the first year of high school. We all went to a rural area and all the boys slept there. Tongpu, At night, after everyone was asleep, several boys went to a boy who was usually very silly and naive. A bottle of water was poured on the bed..., And then pretended to be asleep After a minute, the silly and innocent boy suddenly sat up from the bed. In the moonlight, he touched his body melancholy and said to himself, Damn it, I peed. Then he looked around and saw that everyone was sleeping soundly, so he secretly moved aside Then he woke up the person next to him and said Hey, you peed and then fell asleep smartly." Hahahahahaha The other bad guys watching in the dark almost stopped laughing while holding their quilts. die Why did I suddenly become Traditional Chinese... , , , , , , , , ", black house" , , " , , " , , " , 23, , , moon ; , Enjoy swiping the small magazine Ying wall wall black editor Surrendering outside the house, ticket hanging , ' " , , , , , , , " , " , , " , , " , , " , twenty four ,