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↑ Wo Mei Wen Hua November Issue Kieslowski [2011]

发信人: xzt (嘘~~我是新猪头...), 信区: Joke 标题: 卧梅闻花十一月刊发信站: 水木社区 (Tue Dec 13 12:31:15 2011), 站内 ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ▄◢◤ ┃ ┃ ︵ ◢█◤ ┃ ┃ (:/ ▍▊/ .┃ ┃ · ▁▂▄▌ | ┃ ┃ 卧 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ 梅 ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ 闻 ━￣ ▋ . ┃ ┃ 花 · · ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ . ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ 十 ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ 一 ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ .月 ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ 刊 . ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ __ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ ˙ ┃ ┃ ▕撕︳ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ￣ ▇▅▇~ . ┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ·好吧，我也发一个80后美女 (转载) ┃ ┃ http://www.newsmth.net/bbsanc.php?p=872-18-12-9-1 ┃ ┃ ·Mario vs. Pacman ︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ http://www.newsmth.net/bbsanc.php?p=872-18-12-9-2 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ ·万圣节的糖果 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ http://www.newsmth.net/bbsanc.php?p=872-18-12-9-3 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |多媒体Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 1页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ·[pic]扎堆起哄 ┃ ┃ http://www.newsmth.net/bbsanc.php?p=872-18-12-9-4 ┃ ┃ ·[pic]fox dog ︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ http://www.newsmth.net/bbsanc.php?p=872-18-12-9-5 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ ·为什么那么多好方案不中标，因为你不了解甲方的真正需求 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ http://www.newsmth.net/bbsanc.php?p=872-18-12-9-6 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |多媒体Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 2页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 同学会上的事 ┃ ┃ —— ray1986ray ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ A同学：米国的XX大学附近那种黑黑的小路上特别容易遭老黑抢劫，兜里︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 要随时准备好50dollar。 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ B同学：反抗啊，跑呗 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ A同学：你能跑过他？ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ B同学：…… ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ A同学：而且周围那么黑，你要反抗还得先把他逗乐了 ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 3页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 做贼 ┃ ┃ —— clairlb ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 小学的时候，村子路口有一片桔子林，不知道是谁的，橘子长得很︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 大，一天，几个小朋友约我一起偷橘子，我很馋，当即同意了，她们在 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 里面摘的不亦乐乎，我在外面望风，她们出来后给了我几个小个 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 的，但是我已经很高兴了，两日后，跟老妈唠嗑想起这事，沟通 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ 了一下。老妈的脸顿时扭曲了，半饷哭笑不得地说：“你白痴 ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ 啊，那是咱们自己家的桔子林啊!" ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 4页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 你后面有一只猪 ┃ ┃ —— jackieand ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 记得在大学时，一晚自习课，想让我同桌班长出一下洋相，我往他︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 后面贴了一张纸，纸上画了一只猪。他后桌是一个很胖的女生，胖女生 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 看到之后猛笑，并且越笑越大声，班长责问她为什么笑。那胖女 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 生边笑边指着班长说：“你后面有一只猪……” ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 5页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 冷:sin和cos ┃ ┃ —— jok ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ @费语胡言:sin和cos是一对夫妇。一天，sin去听相声了，cos在家。过︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 了一会，有人敲门，cos开门一看，是一个不认识的多项式函数。cos问： (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 你是谁啊？他说：我是你的老公sin啊。cos说：你不是去听相声 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 了吗？怎么成这幅摸样了？他说：是啊，太乐了！ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 6页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 陌生男子闯进xinghe婚礼 ┃ ┃ —— yutourr ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 在今天普天同庆星河大婚之日，突然有个陌生男子闯进了xinghe的︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 婚礼。新娘一把把xinghe到身后，问到：说吧，你是来抢我的，还是新 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 郎的？还是伴娘？哈市伴郎？星河从新娘背后探出头：还是追封 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 我14d的？陌生男子说：你们joke上多了吧，我是司仪。 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 7页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 我是个坏人 ┃ ┃ —— cicimelon ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 刚才跟以前同事发短信，她说她不喜欢北京，夜里都被干醒了。我︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 不淡定了。。。我思维太活跃了。。。我大笑抽风，我心想：妈呀！！！ (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 姐们真实诚，措辞太大胆了 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 半分钟后偶不好意思的醒悟，念第一声：干醒 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 8页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 真巧我们班也有一个叫李娜的 ┃ ┃ —— django ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 一个傻乎乎的同事讲的他大学毕业卖书时的一个经历︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 这个同事在吉大读书大四的时候在学校里摆摊卖书 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 来了一个女孩翻看他摆的书 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 同事也就有心没肺的跟人家攀谈起来 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ 同事：“同学你叫什么名字” ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ 女孩：“我叫李娜” ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ 同事很夸张惊讶的语气：好巧啊，我们班也有一个叫李娜的 ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ 女孩：你看清楚了，我就是你们班李娜！ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ 敢情我这个同事上了大学四年快毕业的时候同 ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ 班同学没认全 ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第 9页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 近视的后果很严重 zz ┃ ┃ —— JimSimons ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 近视，但不爱戴眼镜。有次和朋友逛商场，在商场观光梯里，看到︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 外面滚动显示器写道：李宇春装B.我便和朋友在电梯里议论：我靠！李 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 宇春得罪这商场啦？公然叫骂。朋友轻声道：人家写的是李宁春 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 装8折。 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第10页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 老白干 ┃ ┃ —— volsky ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 公司一群基层员工年底聚会，没有加薪没有升职连年终奖金都被取︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 消了，打算借酒浇愁一回。有人带了瓶酒来，大家一看那酒的名字，眼 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 泪就都扑簌簌地往下掉开了，还有人顿时抱头痛哭了一场。那酒 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 的名字叫老白干。 ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第11页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 女朋友扇了我一巴掌跟我分手了……ZZ ┃ ┃ —— Dabr ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 上周女朋友跟我分手了，至今我仍然不明白为什么。︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 她问我有过几个女朋友。 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ 我说算上她三个， ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ 第一个没什么特点，蛮普通的， ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ 第二个有点文艺... ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ 然后她扇了我一巴掌就跟我分手了... ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第12页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 雪地里的浪漫ZZ（可能微E） ┃ ┃ —— Laysia ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 一个寒冷的清晨，女孩迎来了自己的生日。忽然男友打电话来说:" ︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 快看窗外！"女孩打开窗，只见楼下白茫茫的雪地上写着几个热气腾腾的 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 大字：生日快乐，我爱....."是你写的吗？"女孩感动极了。"是 ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 啊，可惜尿不够了......" ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第13页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 真人真事 ┃ ┃ —— njforest ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 发信站: 虎踞龙蟠SBBS (Tue Nov 22 10:44:36 2011), 站内︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 昨晚我室友回来，说被他师姐鄙视了，因为他师姐对她惊呼： ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ “你竟然还用IE！！！” ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ 然后我安慰他： ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ “别听你师姐装逼，现在IE用户仍然是最多的。” ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ 然后我问他师姐用什么浏览器， ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ “360.” ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ “…………” ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第14页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 今天坐地铁 ┃ ┃ —— panyrd ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 和老婆出门，她在地铁里累了就双手挂我脖子上休息。忽然间手机︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 响了，老婆顺手抢过来一看。短信上写着：“报告大哥！在地铁发现嫂 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 子，和一个穿得很委琐的傻B男人抱在一起！！怎么办？” ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第15页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 表妹怀孕了 ┃ ┃ —— water1111 ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 妹妹今天来电话：姐恭喜你成为大姨妈︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 然后就挂了。。。 (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第16页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 清华到底有多大 zz ┃ ┃ —— VampireJax ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ @清华南都：清华大学到底有多大？据说北门水果摊阿姨拒绝了东门保安︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 大叔的示爱，理由是接受不了异地恋！ (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第17页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 微博 ┃ ┃ —— xicun ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 宅男相亲，遇美女，脸唰的就白了，尴尬中美女问：你有微博吗？︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ 宅男越发紧张：好…好像不止… (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |普通Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第18页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 3000积分，怎么也得留个脚印 ┃ ┃ —— klglfgljl ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 恩，不能白来一趟。︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 另外，给大家讲个笑话： ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ 某次，带着宝宝闲逛，经过一小摊，听到：“买一送一。” ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ 宝宝问我：“‘买一送一’是‘买一件衣服，送一件衣服吗’？” ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |黑屋Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第19页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┃ 月刊编辑 ┃ ┃ —————————— ┃ ┃ mmjoke - ap9 ︵ ◢ ┃ ┃ joke - xzt (:/ ▍▊┃ ┃ 小黑屋 - xzt ▁▂▄▌ |┃ ┃ 刷墙工 - Kieslowski ▁▂▃▅◢◤ ▎ ┃ ┃ ▆▇ _ ╱ /█ ┃ ┃ ━￣ ▋ ┃ ┃ ▃◤▊ ┃ ┃ ▄▆ ◤ ▍ ┃ ┃ ▁▃ ▄◤▔▁(:◥ ┃ ┃ ▊_:,▆ ◢◤ ▆ ┃ ┃ ▄▂◤▂◢◤ ┃ ┃ ▁▂▄▂▂▄◤ ┃ ┃ ⌒ ▂▁▄▂▄▆▊ |黑屋Joke|˙ ┃ ┃ (; ）▃◤ ▋ . · ┃ ┃ ▇▅▇~ ▕▎ 第20页 .┃ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Sender: xzt Shh I am a new pig head... , message area: Joke Title: November issue of Wo Mei Wen Hua Sending site: Shuimu Community Tue Dec 13 12:31:15 2011 , within the site : . lie down plum smell . flower . ten : one :, .moon Journal . ⌒ tear ; . . Okay, I’ll also post a post-80s beauty and repost it http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 18 12 9 1 Mario vs. Pacman http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 12 9 2 : halloween candy http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 12 9 3 : :, ⌒ Multimedia Joke ; . page 1 . [pic]Get together and make noise http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 12 9 4 [pic]fox dog http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 12 9 5 : Why do so many good plans fail to win the bid? Because you don’t understand Party A’s real needs. http: www.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 872 18 12 9 6 : :, ⌒ Multimedia Joke ; . page 2 . Things at the class reunion ray1986ray Student A. The dark alleys near XX University in the United States are particularly easy to be robbed by gangsters. Always have 50dollar ready: Classmate B, resist and run away Student A, can you outrun him? Classmate B Student A, and it’s so dark around you. If you want to resist, you have to make him laugh first. : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 3. Be a thief clairlb When I was in primary school, there was an orange grove at the intersection of the village. I don’t know who owned it. The oranges grew very tall. One day, several children asked me to steal oranges together. I was very greedy and immediately agreed. They were at: I had a great time picking them inside. I was watching the wind outside. When they came out, they gave me a few small ones. Yes, but I was already very happy. Two days later, I thought about this and communicated with my mother. After a moment, my mother’s face suddenly became distorted, and she said in a dumbfounded voice, “You are an idiot.” Ah, that's our own orange grove!" : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 4. There is a pig behind you jackieand I remember when I was in college, one night during self-study class, I wanted to make a fool of my classmate, so I went to him. There is a piece of paper pasted on the back with a pig drawn on it. Behind him is a very fat girl. Fat girl: After seeing it, she laughed fiercely and laughed louder and louder. The monitor asked her why she was laughing. That fat girl The student smiled and pointed at the monitor and said there is a pig behind you. : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 5. Cold: sin and cos jok @Feiyuhuyan: sin and cos are a couple. One day sin went to listen to cross talk and cos was at home. After a while, someone knocked on the door. When Cos opened the door, he saw it was a polynomial function he didn’t recognize. Cos asked: Who are you? He said I am your husband Sin. Cos said you are not going to listen to cross talk. Why did it look like this? He said, "Yes, I'm so happy." : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 6. Strange man broke into Xinghe wedding yutourr Today, when everyone is celebrating the wedding of Xinghe, a strange man suddenly broke into Xinghe’s house. At the wedding, the bride held her sex behind her and asked, "Tell me, are you here to rob me or the new one?" The groom's is still the bridesmaid, the Harbin best man, Xinghe pokes his head out from behind the bride, is still a posthumous title I'm 14 days old and a strange man said, "You joke a lot, right? I'm the master of ceremonies." : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 7. i am a bad person cicimelon I just sent a text message to my former colleague. She said she didn’t like Beijing and she woke me up from being fucked all night. I wasn’t calm anymore. My mind was too active. I laughed out loud and convulsed. I thought to myself, OMG: Sisters, you are so sincere. Your words are too bold. Half a minute later I woke up embarrassingly and said the first sound to wake up. : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 8. What a coincidence, there is also a girl named Li Na in our class django A silly colleague told an experience he had when he was selling books after graduating from college. This colleague was studying at Jilin University and when he was a senior, he set up a stall to sell books in the school: A girl came and looked through the books he laid out My colleagues started chatting with them heartlessly. Colleague, classmate, what is your name? Girl, my name is Li Na Colleagues expressed exaggerated surprise. What a coincidence. There is also a student named Li Na in our class. Girl, you see clearly, I am Li Na from your class I'm sorry to say that this colleague of mine went to college for four years and was about to graduate: My classmates didn’t recognize everything:, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 9. The consequences of myopia are serious zz JimSimons I'm short-sighted but don't like wearing glasses. Once I went to a shopping mall with my friends and saw it in the shopping mall sightseeing elevator. The scrolling display outside wrote Li Yuchun B. I was discussing with my friends in the elevator. Holy shit Li: Yuchun offended this shopping mall and scolded her openly. My friend said softly, "The person they wrote was Li Ningchun." 20% off on clothes : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 10. Lao Baigan volsky A group of lower-level employees of the company had a party at the end of the year. They received no salary increase, no promotion, and even the year-end bonus was withdrawn. I was going to drown my sorrows with wine. Someone brought a bottle of wine. When everyone looked at the name of the wine, they looked: Tears fell down in a rush, and some people immediately hugged their heads and cried. His name is Lao Baigan : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 11. My girlfriend slapped me and broke up with me ZZ Dabr My girlfriend broke up with me last week and I still don’t understand why. : She asked me how many girlfriends I had I said count her three The first one has no special features and is quite ordinary. The second one is a bit artistic... : :, Then she slapped me and broke up with me... ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 12. Romance in the snow ZZ May Wei E Laysia One cold morning, the girl celebrated her birthday. Suddenly her boyfriend called and said: " Look out the window. The girl opened the window and saw several steaming words written on the white snow downstairs: Happy birthday in big letters. I love..."Did you write it?" The girl was so touched. "Yes." Ah, it’s a pity that I don’t have enough urine..." : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 13. real people njforest Sending station: Hu Ju Long Pan SBBS Tue Nov 22 10:44:36 2011 , within the site : Last night my roommate came back and said that he was despised by his senior sister because he exclaimed to her You still use IE? Then I comforted him Don't listen to your senior sister's pretense. IE users are still the most Then I asked his senior sister what browser she used 360. : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 14. Take the subway today panyrd I was out with my wife when she got tired on the subway and put her hands around my neck to rest. Suddenly, her cell phone When it rang, my wife grabbed it and took a look. The text message said: Report that my brother found my sister-in-law on the subway: What should I do if I’m hugging a stupid man who’s wearing too little clothing? : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 15. Cousin is pregnant water1111 My sister called me today. Congratulations on becoming an aunt. Then it hung up: : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 16. How big is Tsinghua zz VampireJax @青华南都 How big is Tsinghua University? It is said that the aunt at the fruit stall at the north gate rejected the security guard at the east gate. The reason for the uncle’s love is that he cannot accept long-distance relationships: : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 17. Weibo xicun The otaku went on a blind date and his face turned pale when he met a beautiful woman. The beautiful woman asked in embarrassment, do you have a Weibo? The otaku is getting more and more nervous. Well, it seems more than: : :, ⌒ Normal Joke ; . Page 18. 3000 points, no matter what, I have to leave a footprint. klglfgljl Well, I can't come here in vain : Also, let me tell you a joke One time when I was strolling with my baby, I passed by a small stall and heard that buy one get one free. My baby asked me if buy one get one free, buy one piece of clothing and get one piece of clothing free? : :, ⌒ Black Room Joke ; . Page 19. Monthly editor mmjoke ap9 joke xzt : Little black room xzt Wall Painter Kieslowski : :, ⌒ Black Room Joke ; . Page 20.