发信人: bingo (天黑了), 信区: Joke
标 题: 和猪头一起看电影的九十月合刊
发信站: 水木社区 (Sat Nov 17 22:40:06 2012), 站内
space~
史上最可爱的 上对齐线
│□│ │□│ ╱ /
│□└────┘□│ ╭───────╮ /
│□┌────┐□│ ╭─╮ │一起看电影吧 │ /
│□│ │□│ │ │ . │ ╲ /
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│ . │ ▕ ╰───────╯ /
│□│/Jo ke\│□│ │ | . 。 . ╱ ○ /
│□│( (00) )│□│ 。 │ ▏ ╱ ▽ /
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ │ │ . ╱ / . .
│□│ │□│ 。 │▕ ╱ /
│□└────┘□│ │ | ╱ / 。
│□┌────┐□│ . │ ▏ ╱ 丿 こ 亠 / 。。
│□│ │□│ ││ ╱ てフヘ ク、 / . .
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ 。 . ╰╯╱ ╭╮ メ り ロ / .
│□│/Jo ke\│□│ ╭╮ ((╯ / 。 。
│□│( (00) )│□│ ╰╯ △ 九十月合刊 / . 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ . ╱ / .
│□│ │□│ ╱ /
│□└────┘□│ ┌ 封面故事 然后呢。。。 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│必学!野生动物格斗指南 ★
│□└────┘□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/125062?s=12506
│□┌────┐□│ ★ 伪装
│□│ │□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/125308?s=12530
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│肿么办啊~ ★
│□│/→ →\│□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/125641?s=12564
│□│( (00) )│□│ ★ 。。最像崔永元的Dog。。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/125699?s=12569
│□│ │□│王鹏你妹动画版 ★
│□└────┘□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/125818?s=12581
│□┌────┐□│ ★ 恩来:主席,这是我上次去联合国开会时带回来的
│□│ │□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/125848?s=12584
│□│ ︵︵* │□│寂寞的技术宅们 zz ★
│□│/← ←\│□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/126110?s=12611
│□│( (00) )│□│ ★ 碟中谍4和谍影重重的区别
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│http://www3.newsmth.net/nForum/article/MMJoke/126300?s=12630
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│ ┌ MMJoke ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│[进版]听来的笑话——儿子的作业(原创,冷)
│□┌────┐□│by SundayMore . 。
│□│ │□│ ___ 。
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│ \╲\ .
│□│/← ←\│□│一个朋友,家有悍妻,特别善妒爱吃醋, \/_\
│□│( (00) )│□│只要发现老公跟女的稍微交往过密一定会发飙, ┆ \\ ~○~
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│大吵大闹。 ︶▽\ 。
│□│ │□│他和儿子都特别怕她。 ∧ 。
│□└────┘□│有一天他检查他儿子的语文作业。 .
│□┌────┐□│有一道故事题,故事大意是说田螺姑娘下凡, 。
│□│ │□│帮人收拾好屋子,做好饭菜balabala的。 。 .
│□│ ︵︵* │□│题目是:小朋友,如果你遇到了田螺姑娘,你会对她说什么呢?
│□│/→ →\│□│只见他儿子用小的几乎看不清的字体写道:
│□│( (00) )│□│阿姨,你快走吧,我妈妈要回来了。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│ ┌ Joke 1 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ .
│□└────┘□│被女博士教育了 。 。
│□┌────┐□│by seak 。
│□│ │□│ 。 ︵
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│ >●- ●
│□│/→ →\│□│一女博士申请一项目成功,对我总结道, . .
│□│( (00) )│□│课题名称显得专业很重要。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│我问起出好题目之秘方。 。 .
│□│ │□│她笑而举例,比如你觉得
│□└────┘□│“基于iOS操作系统的抛物重力与结构应力模拟系统” . .
│□┌────┐□│专业不?
│□│ │□│我十分崇拜的点头,之后她把iPAD递给我说, 。
│□│ ︵︵* │□│那你玩过“愤怒的小鸟”么? 。 .
│□│/← ←\│□│ .
│□│( (00) )│□│
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│ ┌ Joke 2 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ 。 . . .
│□└────┘□│七八月份段子自选 . 。
│□┌────┐□│by yutourr .
│□│ │□│ *~╮
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│一个女人走进一家整容医院:“我要D cup。” /(~( . .
│□│/← ←\│□│医生:“一个5000。” 女人:“我两个都做。” \︵╯ .
│□│( (00) )│□│医生:“7500。” 女人:“不是1万吗?” /∩)
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│医生:“第二杯半价。” . \|︳ 。
│□│ │□│ . . /"\
│□└────┘□│1919年,北大校长蔡元培路过图书馆, .
│□┌────┐□│发现一个年轻的小伙子在认真的看书, 。 . . .
│□│ │□│一边看一边做笔记。
│□│ ︵︵* │□│蔡元培点点头,走上前去问道:“小伙子,你是谁?很认真嘛。”
│□│/→ →\│□│小伙子抬起头,操着浓浓的湖南口音说:“我是毛主席。”
│□│( (00) )│□│
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│“我成亲了。”
│□│ │□│“恭喜恭喜,能讲一下细节吗?”
│□└────┘□│“注册了个淘宝,就变成亲了。” ┌ Joke 3 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ ____
│□└────┘□│张无忌和张三丰的笑话 . ╱____╲ . 。
│□┌────┐□│by laokuang / /╭╮\ \
│□│ │□│ \ ╲_/ ││ 。
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│张无忌对张三丰说: 。 ╲___╱ /
│□│/→ →\│□│“太师父,武当山的生活太寂寞了, / .
│□│( (00) )│□│只有清风和明月两个朋友能陪我玩。” / .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│张三丰叹了口气: 。 /
│□│ │□│“已经很不错啦,至少还有清风明月呢。 │ 。 .
│□└────┘□│想当年我在少林寺的时候,也是只有两个朋友, │
│□┌────┐□│其中一个也叫清风……” \ 。
│□│ │□│“那另一个呢?” \
│□│ ︵︵* │□│“叫心相印。” . 。 │ 。 .
│□│/← ←\│□│
│□│( (00) )│□│ . . 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ 。
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│ ┌ Joke 4 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
。
│□│ │□│ . __________________ .
│□└────┘□│自动连接 。 ╱ ________________ ╲
│□┌────┐□│by vooodooo ╱ ╱ ╲ ╲
│□│ │□│ ╱ ╱ ______________ ╲ ╲
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│一个女的 ╱ ╱ ╱ ____________ ╲ ╲ ╲
│□│/← ←\│□│拿了老公的IPAD / / ╱ ╱ ╲ ╲ \ \
│□│( (00) )│□│到闺蜜家上网, │ / ╱ ╱ __________ ╲ ╲ \ │
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│结果发现WIFI  ̄ / / ╱ ________ ╲ \ \  ̄
│□│ │□│自动连上了。。。 │ / ╱ ╱ ╲ ╲ \ │
│□└────┘□│  ̄ │ / ____ \ │  ̄
│□┌────┐□│ .  ̄ ╱ ╲  ̄ .
│□│ │□│ 。 / \
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ │ │ 。
│□│/→ →\│□│ . . 。 \ / 。
│□│( (00) )│□│ ╲____╱ .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ 。
│□│ │□│ 。 。 .
│□└────┘□│ ┌ Joke 5 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ 。 . .
│□└────┘□│骨折 。
│□┌────┐□│by maha . 。
│□│ │□│ 。
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│今天路过一服装店, ︵___ ↓ __︵ .
│□│/→ →\│□│门口大幅标写着: ( > > )
│□│( (00) )│□│大喊钓鱼岛是中国的,打九折, ( ___> >_ ) 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│大喊日本是中国的,打八折。 ︶ ┆ ┇ ︶
│□│ │□│我看老板娘很漂亮, ┆
│□└────┘□│就顺便问了一句: .
│□┌────┐□│如果大喊老板娘是我的,打几折? .
│□│ │□│老板娘说:打骨折。 。 . 。
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ 。 。
│□│/← ←\│□│ . 。 . 。 。
│□│( (00) )│□│
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ .
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│ ┌ Joke 6 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│现在的班主任难当啊
│□┌────┐□│by ringch
│□│ │□│
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│真事儿:
│□│/← ←\│□│我有个同学当高三班主任, 。
│□│( (00) )│□│班里两个孩子谈恋爱, .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│她把他们家长叫来了, .
│□│ │□│结果那男孩儿的爸爸来看到那女孩儿之后, 。
│□└────┘□│华丽丽的来了一句: 。
│□┌────┐□│哟,这妞儿长得不错啊。 .
│□│ │□│ ││|| ..
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ . ╲ ╱ ││||
│□│/→ →\│□│ 。 ╲ ╱ ││| 。。
│□│( (00) )│□│ 。 ╱ ╲ │
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ ╱ ── ╲ . .
│□│ │□│ 。
│□└────┘□│ 。 。 . ┌ Joke 7 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ 。 。 . └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ .
│□└────┘□│精确计量——同仁堂 .
│□┌────┐□│by weee .. 。
│□│ │□│ 。 ┌──┐
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│总以为外国人做事严谨, │ │ 。
│□│/→ →\│□│不似中国人搞什么都是凭经验, │ │
│□│( (00) )│□│菜谱啥的都整个“少许”、“一勺”…… │ │ .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│今天嗓子不舒服, │ ┤12.5
│□│ │□│拿了一瓶同仁堂的“川贝口服液”, │~~│ . 。
│□└────┘□│上写着每次10ML, . │ │
│□┌────┐□│还送了一个带刻度的计量杯。 . │ ┤7.5 。
│□│ │□│心中大赞, │ │
│□│ ︵︵* │□│到底是老字号,大公司, │ ┤2.5
│□│/← ←\│□│汲取了西洋科学严谨之精神。 。 ┌┴──┴┐ .
│□│( (00) )│□│待到往计量杯中倒药, . └────┘ .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│才发现刻度尺标着: 。
│□│ │□│2.5ml、7.5ml,12.5ml…… .
│□└────┘□│坑爹啊………… ┌ Joke 8 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ iPhone 4 iPhone 5
│□└────┘□│
│□┌────┐□│ ╭─────────╮ ╭─────────╮
│□│ │□│ │ ── │ │ ── │
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│ │ ┌──────┐ │ │ ┌──────┐ │
│□│/← ←\│□│ │ │水木猪头列表│ │ │ │水木猪头列表│ │
│□│( (00) )│□│ │ │1.ap9 │ │ │ │1.ap9 │ │
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ │ │2.biancr │ │ │ │2.biancr │ │
│□│ │□│ │ │3.mmzt │ │ │ │3.mmzt │ │
│□└────┘□│ │ │4.Yvt │ │ │ │4.Yvt │ │
│□┌────┐□│ │ │5.Jobs │ │ │ │5.Jobs │ │
│□│ │□│ │ │6.DK72 │ │ │ │6.DK72 │ │
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ │ │7.yyzt │ │ │ │7.yyzt │ │
│□│/→ →\│□│ │ │8.FZD │ │ │ │8.FZD │ │
│□│( (00) )│□│ │ │9.cu0 │ │ │ │9.cu0 │ │
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ │ └──────┘ │ │ │10.doolt │ │
│□│ │□│ │ ◎ │ │ │11.ahb │ │
│□└────┘□│ ╰─────────╯ │ └──────┘ │
│□┌────┐□│原来iPhone5竟然是多特和ahb的阴谋! │ ◎ │
│□│ │□│by l024 ╰─────────╯
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│身为一个码农,混的最背的时候是什么时候?
│□┌────┐□│by keygen 。
│□│ │□│ . 。
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│老板拉着吃酒席,旁边是秘书, . 。 .
│□│/→ →\│□│对面是另外公司的美女, ____
│□│( (00) )│□│老板介绍说,来来来, . | |
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│这位是我们的高级工程师某某... |____| 。
│□│ │□│吃着吃着吃不动了, . ┌┴┴┐-╮
│□└────┘□│老板说,要不结帐吧, └──┘ /
│□┌────┐□│(美女们)你们要不要坐我新买的车啊? /_______/// .
│□│ │□│服务员问,还有这么多菜怎么办?
│□│ ︵︵* │□│老板看了四周一圈, . 。
│□│/← ←\│□│说打包了让这位高级工程师带回去当吧。
│□│( (00) )│□│ 。 . 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│ ┌ Joke 10 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│为何至此联合国都没对此次钓鱼岛事件表个态?
│□┌────┐□│by yanl
│□│ │□│
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│答:
│□│/← ←\│□│“小国和小国之间有矛盾,
│□│( (00) )│□│联合国一调解,矛盾没了。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│小国和大国之间有矛盾,
│□│ │□│联合国一调解,小国没了。
│□└────┘□│大国和大国之间有矛盾,
│□┌────┐□│联合国一调解,联合国没了。”
│□│ │□│ .
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ _____ _____
│□│/→ →\│□│ 。 _/ \── ──/ \_ . 。
│□│( (00) )│□│ <_☆_______> 。 。 <_______☆_>
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ . ╰────╯ . . ╰────╯ . .
│□│ │□│ 。 . . . . 。
│□└────┘□│ . 。 . 。 . ┌ Joke 11 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│Lambda Lambda
│□┌────┐□│by orz
│□│ │□│
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│Musa 说:
│□│/→ →\│□│一个伊朗人问我
│□│( (00) )│□│"China has its own Facebook, right? Lambda Lambda?"
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│
│□│ │□│ . ___ ___ 。 .
│□└────┘□│ ╱ __╲ ╱__ ╲ . .
│□┌────┐□│ / ││ \/ ││ \ .
│□│ │□│ 。 │ //\\ //\\ │ 。 。
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ \ // \\/\// \\ /
│□│/← ←\│□│ ╲___╱ ╲___╱ . .
│□│( (00) )│□│ . 。 .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ .
│□│ │□│ . .
│□└────┘□│ 。 。 ┌ Joke 12 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ . └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ . . ..
│□└────┘□│[进版]伟大的joke ____
│□┌────┐□│by T195 . . ╱;;;;╲ .
│□│ │□│ 。 /○ ○\ 。
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│joke是一个值得来的地方, ( (00) ) .
│□│/← ←\│□│上面挂着很多zt, . 。 ︶︶︶ 。
│□│( (00) )│□│不过只有一个是头z, __________________
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│其他的不过是头z, . ____ .
│□│ │□│他们的口味各不相同, ╱;;;;╲
│□└────┘□│有的喜欢看A片,有的喜欢看A片, /○ ○\ .
│□┌────┐□│有的喜欢米,有的喜欢米, 。 ( (00) )
│□│ │□│有的喜欢下面,有的喜欢下面。 ︶︶︶
│□│ ︵︵* │□│常去joke看看是非常值得的,  ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄
│□│/→ →\│□│你应该经常进去, 。 . . .
│□│( (00) )│□│但是偶尔不小心也会进去。 . 。 . 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│如果你年复一年的泡joke, 。 . .
│□│ │□│也许你会看着笑话变老,
│□└────┘□│也许你会看着笑话变老。 ┌ Joke 13 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│不是一无所有zz
│□┌────┐□│by oldbug
│□│ │□│
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│@QiubaiBot: 在电梯听到一妹纸打电话:
│□│/→ →\│□│“陈先生,请您再也不要说自己一无所有了,
│□│( (00) )│□│你不是有病吗?”
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│我瞬间觉得这个女人气场非常大!!! .
│□│ │□│http://t.co/7j1D33N4
│□└────┘□│ .
│□┌────┐□│ 。。 _ . 。
│□│ │□│ / ] .
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ . . 。 │( ┌┴┴┐ 。 .
│□│/← ←\│□│ \_] │╭╮│ . .
│□│( (00) )│□│ . 。 . . ( ╭┤╰╯│ 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ 。 . ︶ └──┘ . . .
│□│ │□│ . .
│□└────┘□│ 。 . . ┌ Joke 14 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ . . └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│节操丧失
│□┌────┐□│by Hzhong
│□│ │□│
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│#春水堂杯段子大赛#
│□│/← ←\│□│时688年,博州刺史琅琊王李冲起兵谋反 ,反对武则天当政,
│□│( (00) )│□│豫州刺史越王李贞起兵响应。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│叛军一路烧杀掳掠,奸淫掠夺,无恶不作。
│□│ │□│张光辅上京,将沿途所见,于殿上泣声奏曰:
│□└────┘□│“吾皇,臣于途中亲眼所见,敌人节操丧失...”
│□┌────┐□│一旁的狄仁杰怒目圆睁,大喝道:
│□│ │□│“你胡说!我何时操过丧尸!” .
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ 。 。 .
│□│/→ →\│□│ . 。 .. 。 .
│□│( (00) )│□│ . ○ . . . 。 。 .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ 。 ▕\ __○ 。 . 。
│□│ │□│ _\ \ \_ .
│□└────┘□│ 。 . ┌ Joke 15 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ . 。 . . └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ 。 . .
│□└────┘□│好黑,好黑啊…… . 。
│□┌────┐□│by DK72 。 .. 。
│□│ │□│ 。
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│在互联网浩瀚的信息海洋中,有一个偏僻的角落, .
│□│/→ →\│□│在这个角落里,有一个偏僻的角落, .. 。 。
│□│( (00) )│□│在这个角落的角落里,还有角落的角落的角落…… 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│就在一个最深层的偏僻角落, . . 。
│□│ │□│joke的小黑屋, 。
│□└────┘□│那个虚拟的世界复活了。 。 . 。
│□┌────┐□│xinghe从天边走来,他披着破烂的长袍, 。
│□│ │□│外面还裹着一张肮脏的兽皮,带着一把青铜剑,
│□│ ︵︵* │□│他的脸像那兽皮一样脏和皱,双眼却很有神,眸子映着曙光。
│□│/← ←\│□│ “有人吗?”他喊道,“有人吗?有人吗……” 。
│□│( (00) )│□│xinghe的声音立刻被这无边的荒漠吞没了,
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│他喊了一阵,疲惫地坐在地上。
│□│ │□│时光飞逝中,没有沧海桑田的演变,只有金属般永恒的荒漠。
│□└────┘□│他长叹一声退出了。 ┌ 小黑屋 1 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│
│□└────┘□│Xinghe再次在小黑屋的荒漠上跋涉, 。 。 。
│□┌────┐□│这时有一个很小的太阳升到中夭, . .
│□│ │□│阳光没有什么热力, .
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│但把荒漠照得很清晰,荒漠上仍空无一物。 。
│□│/← ←\│□│“有人吗?有人吗?有人吗……” .
│□│( (00) )│□│突然眼睛一亮, . 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│xinghe看到一个人骑着马从天边飞奔而来。 . .
│□│ │□│并远远地认出了那人是gcat, 。
│□└────┘□│于是冲他拼命地挥手。 。
│□┌────┐□│gcat很快来到xinghe身前,勒住了马,跳下来后赶紧扶正假发。
│□│ │□│“你瞎嚷嚷什么,是谁又建了这鬼地方,”
│□│ ︵︵* │□│gcat挥手指指小黑屋的天花板问。 . .
│□│/→ →\│□│xinghe没有回答他的话, 。 . .
│□│( (00) )│□│而是拉住他的手急切地诉说: .
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│“同志,我的同志,我告诉你, 。
│□│ │□│水木没有抛弃我们,或者说它抛弃我们是有理由的,
│□└────┘□│它以后需要我们了,它……” ┌ 小黑屋 2 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
│□│ │□│ ╱ /
│□└────┘□│ 总作者 ╱ /
│□┌────┐□│ Joke bingo ╱ /
│□│ │□│ MMJoke VampireJax ╱ /
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│ 小黑屋 FZD ╱ /
│□│/Jo ke\│□│ 刷墙工 halleyhit ╱ ○ /
│□│( (00) )│□│ ╱ ▽ /
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ ╱ ╭────────╮/
│□│ │□│╭───────╮ ╱ │然后就没有然后了 ╱
│□└────┘□││我要去看Joke │ ╱ │。。。 │
│□┌────┐□││!!! ╲ ╰────────╯
│□│ │□│╰───────╯ /
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ ╱ ╭╮ /
│□│/Jo ke\│□│ ╱ ((╯ /
│□│( (00) )│□│ ╱ △ /
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ ╱ /
│□│ │□│ ╱ /
│□└────┘□│ ┌ 封底故事 。。。 ┐
│□┌────┐□│ └Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│
。
│□│ │□│怎么能没有 ┌─┐ ┌─┐ 呢?!?! 。
│□└────┘□│ │ └─┐ │┌─┐ . . .
│□┌────┐□│ ┌╯ │ ││ │ 。
│□│ │□│ │ │ │┌╯└─╯ 。
│□│ ︵︵︵ │□│ └──╯ ││ │ 说好的—— . .
│□│/Jo ke\│□│ │ ││ │└┐ ┌╯ .
│□│( (00) )│□│ └─╯╯ │┌╯ ┐ 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ │ ││ ││ 你会看着笑话变老
│□│ │□│ └────╯└──╯╯
│□└────┘□│ │ ││ ││ │ │ 。 。
│□┌────┐□│ └─╯└─╯└─╯─╯ . 。
│□│ │□│ ┌────────┐ . .
│□│ ︵︵* │□│ │ │ 。 。 . 。
│□│/Jo ke\│□│ │ ┌──────┘ . .
│□│( (00) )│□│ │ │ 。 。 。
│□│ ︶︶︶ │□│ │ ┌──────╯ . .
│□│ │□│ │ ││ │ 。
│□└────┘□│ ┌┘ ││ └── │┌ 封底然后的故事 。。。┐
│□┌────┐□│ │ ││ │└Joke月刊 2012年9-10月刊┘
│□│ │□│ └──╯└─────╯
[END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END][END]
Sender: bingo It’s dark, message area: Joke
Title: September and October issue of Watching Movies with Pig Head
Sending site: Shuimu Community Sat Nov 17 22:40:06 2012 , within the site
space
The cutest upward alignment line ever
Let's watch a movie together
.
.
Jo ke . .
00
. . .
.丿こ亠
てフヘ ク . .
. メ り ロ .
Jo ke
00 September-October issue.
. .
Cover Story What then?
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
Must-learn Guide to Wild Animal Fighting
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 125062?s 12506
camouflage
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 125308?s 12530
What to do?
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 125641?s 12564
00 The Dog that most resembles Cui Yongyuan
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 125699?s 12569
Wang Peng, your sister animated version
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 125818?s 12581
Enlai, Chairman, I brought this back when I went to the United Nations for a meeting last time.
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 125848?s 12584
Lonely tech nerds zz
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 126110?s 12611
00 The difference between Mission: Impossible 4 and The Bourne Supremacy
http: www3.newsmth.net nForum article MMJoke 126300?s 12630
MMJoke
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
[Advanced Edition] Jokes I Heard, My Son’s Homework, Original, Cold
by SundayMore.
.
A friend has a fierce wife who is very jealous and jealous.
00 If you find out that your husband is having too close contact with a woman, he will definitely go crazy.
too noisy
Both he and his son are particularly afraid of her
One day he checked his son's Chinese homework.
There is a story title. The main idea of the story is that the snail girl descended to the earth.
Help people clean up their house and prepare balabala meals.
The topic is, children, if you met a snail girl, what would you say to her?
I saw his son writing in small and almost legible fonts
00 Auntie, please go quickly. My mother is coming back.
Joke 1
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
.
Educated by a female doctor
by seak
>
A female Ph.D. student successfully applied for a project and concluded to me...
00 It is important for the topic title to appear professional
I asked about the secret recipe for good questions.
She smiled and gave an example. For example, do you think
Parabolic gravity and structural stress simulation system based on iOS operating system. .
Not professional
I nodded with great admiration and then she handed me the iPad and said
Have you ever played Angry Birds?
.
00
Joke 2
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
. . .
Choose your own jokes for July and August.
by yutourr.
A woman walks into a plastic surgery hospital. I want a D cup...
Doctor, a 5000 woman, I do both.
00 Doctor 7500 Woman Isn’t it 10,000?
Doctor, the second cup is half price.
. . "
In 1919, Cai Yuanpei, president of Peking University, passed by the library.
I found a young man reading a book seriously...
Take notes while reading
Cai Yuanpei nodded, walked up and asked, "Young man, who are you? Are you serious?"
The young man raised his head and said in a thick Hunan accent, "I am Chairman Mao."
00
I'm married
Congratulations. Can you tell me the details?
Registering on Taobao turns into kissing Joke 3
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
The joke between Zhang Wuji and Zhang Sanfeng...
by laokuang
Zhang Wuji said to Zhang Sanfeng
Grand Master, life in Wudang Mountain is too lonely.
00 Only two friends, Qingfeng and Mingyue, can play with me.
Zhang Sanfeng sighed
It's already pretty good. At least there's a clear breeze and bright moon.
I remember when I was in Shaolin Temple, I only had two friends.
One of them is also called Qingfeng
What about the other one?
It’s called heart to heart. .
00 . .
Joke 4
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
. .
auto connect
byvooodooo
a woman
I took my husband’s IPAD
00 Go to your best friend’s house to surf the Internet
It turned out that WIFI
Automatically connected
. .
. .
00.
.
Joke 5
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
. .
fracture
by maha.
I passed by a clothing store today.
A large sign at the door reads >>
00 Shouting that the Diaoyu Islands belong to China and getting a 10% discount >>
Shouting that Japan belongs to China will give you a 20% discount.
I think the boss lady is very beautiful
Just asked by the way.
If you shout that the boss lady is mine, how much discount will you get?
The boss lady said it was a fracture.
. .
00
.
Joke 6
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
It’s hard to be the head teacher now
by ringch
true story
I have a classmate who is the head teacher of the third year of high school
00 Two children in the class fell in love.
She called their parents.
As a result, the boy's father came and saw the girl
came a gorgeous sentence
Yo, this girl is pretty.
..
.
00
. .
. Joke 7
. Joke Monthly September 10, 2012
.
Accurate measurement Tong Ren Tang.
by weee..
I always think that foreigners are rigorous in doing things
Unlike the Chinese who do everything based on experience
00 The whole recipe is a little bit a spoonful.
My throat feels uncomfortable today 12.5
I picked up a bottle of Tongrentang Chuanbei Oral Liquid.
It says 10ML each time.
Also comes with a measuring cup with a scale. 7.5
Praise in my heart
After all, it is a time-honored and big company 2.5
It absorbs the rigorous spirit of Western science.
00 Wait until the medicine is poured into the measuring cup. .
Only then did I realize that the scale marked
2.5ml 7.5ml 12.5ml.
What a cheat Joke 8
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
iPhone 4 iPhone 5
List of Mizuki Pig Heads List of Mizuki Pig Heads
00 1.ap9 1.ap9
2.biancr 2.biancr
3.mmzt 3.mmzt
4.Yvt 4.Yvt
5.Jobs 5.Jobs
6.DK72 6.DK72
7.yyzt 7.yyzt
8.FZD 8.FZD
00 9.cu0 9.cu0
10.doolt
11.ahb
It turns out that iPhone5 is actually a conspiracy between Dot and ahb
by l024
As a coder, when is the worst time?
by keygen
.
The boss was having a banquet with the secretary next to him...
Opposite me is a beauty from another company
00 The boss introduced, come on, come on.
This is our senior engineer XX...
I kept eating and couldn't stop eating.
The boss said, why don't you pay the bill?
Beauties, do you want to take a ride in my new car?
The waiter asked what should I do if there are so many more dishes?
The boss looked around.
I told him to pack it up and let the senior engineer take it back as a pawn.
00.
Joke 10
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
Why has the United Nations not taken a stance on the Diaoyu Islands incident so far?
by yanl
answer
There are conflicts between small countries and small countries
00 The United Nations mediates and the conflict disappears
There are conflicts between small countries and big countries
Once the United Nations mediates, small countries will disappear.
There are conflicts between great powers and great powers
The United Nations mediates and the United Nations is gone
.
.
00 < > < >
. . . . . .
. . . .
. . . Joke 11
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
Lambda Lambda
by orz
Musa says
an Iranian asked me
00 "China has its own Facebook, right? Lambda Lambda?"
. .
. .
.
. .
00 . .
.
. .
Joke 12
. Joke Monthly September 10, 2012
. . ..
[Advanced Edition] Great joke
by T195 . . ;;;; .
joke is a place worth coming to 00.
There are a lot of zt hanging on it.
00 But only one is the head
The rest are just gimmicks...
Their tastes vary ;;;;
Some like to watch pornographic movies, some like to watch pornographic movies.
Some like rice and some like rice 00
Some like the bottom and some like the bottom
It is very worthwhile to visit joke often.
You should go in often . . .
00 But sometimes I accidentally get in. .
If you joke year after year...
Maybe you'll watch the jokes get old
Maybe you'll watch the jokes get old Joke 13
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
It’s not nothingzz
by oldbug
@QiubaiBot: I heard a girl talking on the phone in the elevator
Mr. Chen, please never say that you have nothing again.
00 Aren’t you sick?
I instantly felt that this woman had a very strong aura.
http: t.co 7j1D33N4
.
.
].
. . .
] . .
00 . . .
. . . .
. .
. . Joke 14
. . Joke Monthly September 10, 2012
Loss of moral integrity
by Hzhong
#春水堂 Cup Joke Contest#
In 688, Li Chong, the governor of Bozhou and king of Langya, rebelled against Wu Zetian.
00 Li Zhen, the governor of Yuzhou and King of Yue, raised troops to respond
The rebels burned, killed, looted, raped and looted all the way.
Zhang Guangfu went to the capital and reported what he saw along the way to the palace in a weeping voice.
My emperor and his ministers saw with their own eyes on the way that the enemy's moral integrity has been lost...
Di Renjie on the side opened his eyes angrily and shouted loudly
You're talking nonsense. When did I fuck a zombie?
.
. . . .
00 . . . . .
.
.
. Joke 15
. . . Joke Monthly September 10, 2012
. .
So dark, so dark.
by DK72 ..
There is a remote corner in the vast ocean of information on the Internet.
In this corner there is a remote corner...
00 in this corner corner corner corner corner corner
Just in the deepest remote corner...
joke's little dark room
The virtual world came to life.
Xinghe came from the horizon, wearing a tattered robe
It was also wrapped in a dirty animal skin and carried a bronze sword.
His face was as dirty and wrinkled as the animal skin, but his eyes were bright and reflected the dawn.
Is anyone there? he shouted. Is anyone there?
00 xinghe's voice was immediately swallowed up by the boundless desert
He shouted for a while and sat on the ground tiredly
As time flies, there is no vicissitudes of evolution, only the metallic and eternal desert.
He sighed and exited Little Dark Room 1
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
Xinghe once again trekked on the desert in the small black house
At this time, a very small sun rose to the middle of the sky...
Sunlight has no heat.
But the desert is illuminated very clearly. There is still nothing on the desert.
Is there anyone? Is there anyone?
00 Suddenly his eyes lit up.
xinghe saw a man galloping from the horizon on horseback...
And recognized the man from a distance as gcat
So I waved to him desperately
gcat quickly came to xinghe, reined in the horse, and quickly straightened the wig after jumping off.
What are you yelling about? Who built this damn place again?
gcat waved his finger and pointed at the ceiling of the small dark room and asked...
xinghe didn't answer his words...
00 Instead, she held his hand and told him eagerly.
Comrade, my comrade, I tell you
Shuimu has not abandoned us, or it has a reason for abandoning us.
It will need us in the future, Little Dark Room 2
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
Chief author
Joke bingo
MMJokeVampireJax
Little black room FZD
Jo ke wall painter halleyhit
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Then there is no more
I want to see Joke
Jo ke
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back cover story
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
How could it not be?
. . .
we agreed . .
Joke.
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You'll watch the jokes get old
.
. .
.
Jo ke . .
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. .
The story behind the back cover
Joke monthly September 2012 October issue
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