Sender: biancr Superman Returns! Talk to Mei! , message area: Joke Title: [Monthly] October issue with crisp autumn air Sending site: Shuimu Community Tue Nov 4 22:19:16 2008 , within the site Part Ⅰ MMJoke ﹢[WMV]how to get a girl ! http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 9 577 ﹢[PIC] Happy days riding bicycles as a child http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 5 984 ﹢[GIF]odom hilarious pass http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 5 987 ﹢[PIC] The pig head is coming http:www.newsmth.netbbsanc.php?p 872 5 988 01 Part Ⅱ Joke My poor dog FMCC The dog at home doesn’t know what he has eaten these past two days, and he farts all the time. Especially he likes to lie next to my bed and sleep. A loud fart will make the whole house stink b So every time my dog ​​farts, I will yell "stinky dog" and then run out of the room in despair. This afternoon my dog ​​slept next to my bed as usual. I was playing on the computer next to him and suddenly farted loudly. The dog immediately jumped up and sniffed his butt nervously. Then he looked at me with an innocent face Seeing my serious look, the dog lowered his head and consciously walked out of the room. 02 Part Ⅱ Joke Dermatology matters Tyo yc, mm saw it in the hospital yesterday. In the clinic, it was a patient's turn to see a doctor. This guy rushed in and held the doctor's hand: "Doctor, please help me." Let me tell you, my wife doesn’t answer my calls anymore, she can’t be found, and she’s about to get married, what should I do..." The doctor was stunned for a moment. He couldn't help but ask him: "This is a hospital..." I saw this big brother pulling up his collar and exposing his neck: "Please check it for me quickly." Then I proved that it was really me who scratched it, not a hickey!" 03 Part Ⅱ Joke Newly bought pants yigeshagual I went out to do errands in the morning and went shopping. I looked at a pair of pants. They were very beautiful. It was a pity that the belt was a belt. It is made up of two big letters SM I said, oh, this is not good. How can I wear it out? The shopping guide smiled sweetly and said, "It's okay. Just tie the belt backwards." The result is reversed WS Oops 04 Part Ⅱ Joke Apply for scholarships from your school bigbusyboy The assistant sent a letter saying that you must apply online, and then I went to try my luck. Personal evaluation is empty >Applicant self-evaluation cannot be empty Personal evaluation Wrote some >Applicant self-evaluation cannot be less than 700 characters Pasted a thought report>Applicant self-evaluation cannot be longer than 700 characters 05 Part Ⅱ Joke After traveling to Hainan, I will tell you some interesting things. FMCC I just came back from a trip to Hainan with my sister. I’ll record the fun things. 1 On the first day in Hainan, I went to Nanshan Temple to visit The most famous thing about Nanshan Temple is a large Nanhai Guanyin tree standing in the middle of the sea. There is also a statue on the other side of the sea. I can see a small island When my sister and I were taking pictures, I suddenly heard the girl next to me pointing excitedly at the one opposite. Xiaodao said to his companions Look, Taiwan! 06 Part Ⅱ Joke 2 The locals in Hainan have darker skin and short noses. They have quite distinctive looks and are easy to recognize. After shopping around all day, mm announced that she found that there didn’t seem to be many local beauties on Hainan Street. One day, my sister and I went to Sanya No. 1 Market to buy seafood. As agreed, we split up. She I'm going to buy crabs and I'm going to buy fish. Before we left, mm specifically told me to act sophisticated and not let profiteers kill me. Who knew I hadn’t finished buying this yet? Then mm came to me with a sullen face. I just asked about the price and asked why it was so expensive today. The one selling crabs He just started talking to me in local dialect. Do I look like a local? 07 Part Ⅱ Joke 3 In the last few days, after visiting Sanya, I stayed in Yalong Bay. The sea in Yalong Bay is the most beautiful in Sanya. mm has been talking about watching the sunrise since she first arrived in Sanya, so at six o'clock in the morning the second day after staying in Yalong Bay He woke me up and took me, who was still awake, to the hotel's private beach, where the two of us lay down. Waiting for the sunrise on the chair There was a gust of sea breeze blowing at the beach and I felt much more awake. Since we agreed to watch the sunrise with her, let’s just wait and watch. In boredom, I took out the small bag containing the room card in my pocket and looked at it. Then he said to mm, go back and stop watching. mm refused I can't help but show mm the hotel map on the back of the small bag. But our current location of the beach is facing the south mm mm fainted. I thought I could see the sunrise at the beach. 08 Part Ⅱ Joke Lovely tour guide ILikeMozart Went to Hangzhou yesterday The tour guide is a chubby girl. Her tour guide flag was taken into the West Lake, so she went to the stick There is a donkey doll tied to one end, which also serves as a flag. A person next to me saw it and exclaimed, "What a fat pig!" The tour guide mm turned around and said viciously, "It doesn't matter if you're talking about me or my donkey." I'm very angry 09 Part Ⅱ Joke The founder of Buddhism is menlu Nobi Yasuo Story: Yasuo was given a bath card by Xiao Jing. After being stuck as a good guy, he took a time machine and traveled to ancient times in depression. Squatting under the Bodhi tree and playing games, Asan passed by and asked him what he was playing. Answer: Sega emulator So people called him Sakyamuni After fighting for seventy-seven and forty-nine days, I finally cleared the level. Shouting, I got it, I got it. Later generations built many memorial halls in memory of him. The names of the museums are Main Hall 10 Part Ⅱ Joke I also have a scary story candypig A friend of mine, Xiao A, is three months pregnant. Her colleague, mm, Xiao B, is just two months pregnant. The two of them always get together. Let’s talk about pregnancy. One day, two girls worked overtime until about 12 o’clock in the evening. The inhumane work unit actually let the pregnant woman The woman worked overtime and then took the elevator downstairs from the 27th floor to go home with another colleague, mm Xiao Bing. The topic of pregnancy continued in the elevator. Xiao C didn't say anything. When the elevator reached the 20th floor, two little girls came up. At this time They looked at the mirrors on three sides of the elevator. Xiao A suddenly said, "Ah, there are 7 people in the elevator now." Ah, Xiao B smiled knowingly, but then Xiao B suddenly said shyly, "No, there are 8 people." A and B both looked at Xiao C in surprise. Well, at this time, the two girls looked around nervously and asked, "Where are there eight?" How can there be eight? Xiao Yi said disapprovingly, "Aren't they all standing here?" 11 Part Ⅱ Joke The little girl's expression changed drastically and she immediately pressed the elevator button and ran out on the 12th floor. Only when they got down to the fifth floor did the three women understand why they ran out. Not funny. I hope it’s not cold. 12 Part Ⅱ Joke Visiting the Temple of the Reclining Buddha with my wife on National Day jojia During the National Day, I went to Wat Pho with my wife My wife was tired from walking, so she acted coyly and insisted on letting me carry her on my back. Unable to defeat her, he had to carry her on his back. Fortunately, my wife is not very fat, Hehe After not walking far, an old lady came towards me: "Young man, I see you have also studied. If you are sick, you still have to go to the hospital. Praying to Buddha is of no use!" 13 Part Ⅱ Joke The spirit of Chinese mahjong is everywhere Olympic theme slogan wanzi GIOL reposted The spirit of Chinese mahjong is everywhere Olympic theme slogan one World, One Dream Read backwards If you want to touch a tube, just a tube Happy weekend everyone and happy Halloween 14 Part Ⅱ Joke It’s over. During the interview, I mentioned downstair as underwear. llywood CCAV reprint Interviewer wants some water? No, thank you, I had enough from the underwear ... finished me 15 Part Ⅱ Joke Biology laboratory rabbit maomiao In the afternoon, there was a demonstration on animal experiments. The medical students were very serious and dressed neatly in white coats. Wearing masks, hats and rubber gloves, after passing mice, rats, hamsters and guinea pigs, we finally arrived. The exciting rabbit Two very senior brothers carefully picked up two rabbits. They were both wrapped perfectly. The lower body is to prevent them from jumping around. Rabbits are so cute and well-behaved that we can’t help it. When I go up and touch it, I can't help but think of the ancient saying that the male rabbit's feet are twitching and the female rabbit's eyes are blurred. Before drawing blood from the rabbit, our senior brother still has to teach us how to identify the male and female, so we have to do it. Open the package on the rabbit. Open one first and hold it to show us its life. reproductive organ, and then another one, and put the two together for comparison. We all nodded in agreement and secretly wondered if such a small thing could be used. 16 Part Ⅱ Joke After the male and female demonstration, the rabbit was placed on the table again, intending to wrap it up for the next blood draw. At the moment when I put it down, in full view of everyone, one of them was so cold and so quick as to cover my ears. The power of stealing the bell jumped to another rabbit I think, wouldn’t it be more convenient to separate male and female this way? 17 Part Ⅱ Joke watch sports news KPI Once, I was watching sports news with my sister at my sister's house. My mother was also sitting next to me, chatting and watching. After introducing the situation in Serie A and the Premier League, the news started talking about the Chinese Super League. The Chinese Super League match screen starts playing on the screen My mother took a look and suddenly asked, is it playing slow motion now? 18 Part Ⅱ Joke There are 5 new people coming to the company hunter771 The leader used to work in the military industry and always spoke with the air of leading troops. Let these five people stand in a row in front of everyone, and then ask them what their last names are. Then 5 people said their last names one after another The first one to say Tian The second one said horse The third one said Liu The fourth said Xing The fifth one said my surname is Wang 19 Part Ⅱ Joke A bunch of people below collectively shouted that your last name should be Quan Your last name should be Quan Your last name should be Quan People over 40 years old are inexplicable. The little girl muttered below that the fifth person ruined perfection too much. Everyone despises people named Wang 20 Part Ⅱ Joke A true story told by a colleague today soloist My colleague’s hometown is Chifeng A friend of his made a fortune a few years ago and bought a Don’t Touch Me 7 Series. I gave some money to the policeman at the DMV and got a license plate with the number D 88888. It's so cool when you drive it out, I'm very satisfied. As a result, a few days ago, my colleague went home to visit relatives and found that his friend had sold the car. It turns out that one day he drove that car to the crematorium to attend the funeral of his friend's father. All the staff at the crematorium came out to watch. He was quite beautiful at first, but an old cremator said to him It turns out that this brand really exists The paper cars we burn with the dead here are all like this. 88888 twenty one Part Ⅱ Joke bus heizizzy During the rush hour last night, bus No. 333 was stuck at the Shuangqing Road railway crossing for more than 10 minutes. I can’t stand it. Discuss with the driver whether he can open the door and get out of the car. The driver sternly vetoes. Get in if you want and get off if you want. You bet. This is a bus, a bus, a bus twenty two Part Ⅲ XiaoHeiWu Ancient style poetry part one liudy02 force force Rubble everywhere Everyone is scattered, animals and birds die Thousands of trees burn the sky and thousands of dust cover the sun There are corpses all along the embankment and vultures crow on both sides of the bank. The river is red, the desert is ten miles long, and the hundreds of houses are dusty and dirty. All the people and animals in the village are gone, forcing good people to abandon their homes. twenty three Part Ⅲ XiaoHeiWu Ancient Style Poetry Part 2 aotian autumn autumn The wind is thin and the frost is thick The spring has passed and the flowers have ceased Living in a deep valley, sitting alone in a small building Smiling at the yellow leaves and looking at the water in the stream Horse racing in the dry grasslands and boating on the Zanbo River There is nothing to envy for being so talented. Gujing Wulan knows no worries. twenty four Part Ⅲ XiaoHeiWu Ancient Style Poetry Part Three aotian rat rat pass through wall Know all the flavors and taste the five grains Stealing a country can make you a king, but where can you steal rice? Entering the mansion at moonrise and returning to the thick earth at sunrise The unlearned white servant Si Chen disdains the yellow slave to protect the master Everyone in the world calls rats hateful. Who in the world can understand the suffering? 25 Thank you for watching. Welcome to vote. The production staff of this monthly magazine: MMJoke editor ............ iseva Edited by Joke ............ biancr Little Black Room Editor ........ yutourr Painting the walls ............ Kieslowski 26