Sender: G42 Shelley RYGH, Area: Joke Title: 2013 annual magazine that continues to cheat in the Year of the Snake Sending site: Shuimu Community Sat Feb 9 12:46:17 2013 , within the site What TV should I watch on New Year’s Eve? Go directly to the Joke Annual , ﹨ ' ﹨ ' ' Sichuan ' ' >卄 ⺗⺗ ' 'Program 1 Page Activity No.1 Print Shirt ⺗⺗ Sender: nForum Hahahaha, so funny ^, message area: JokeTshirt Title: [Men, please be careful] I’m here to show off my shirts too Sending site: Shuimu Community Tue Aug 14 13:55:51 2012 , within the site The shirt is good, but the sleeves are a bit tight I took a time-lapse shot of one big and one small http: att.newsmth.net bbsanc.php?p 940 11 8 1 26&ap 285.png 01 ﹨ ' ' No.2 Make a wish What's the fuss about? Let the pig's head board the boat first ﹨ Before 2012 comes . . ﹨ Help 2012 I have three wishes J丿 ARK let me on board 1 . 2 3 ﹨ ﹨ . . Hello everyone, I am the great congee customer Dio the World. The end of the world is finally over. The past year is condensed into one sentence. After waiting for the end for twelve months, I found out that it was all fake. A new century full of hope is coming, on this beautiful Christmas Eve I'm going to make my New Year's resolution. Please don't eavesdrop. Wish one Tell me how many wishes you have Wish 2 I hope to have one more wish Wish three Damn it, I wasted 23 wishes Finally, I want to say to the porridge customers Give me three more wishes...please beg ' ' Program 2 Daily life No. 1 Jokes heard Son's homework by SundayMore ⺗⺗ I heard from my friends A friend has a fierce wife who is very jealous and gets jealous whenever she finds out that her husband has been dating her for a while. Mi will definitely get angry and make a lot of noise. Both he and his son are particularly afraid of her. One day he checked his son's Chinese homework There is a story title. The general idea of ​​the story is that the snail girl came down to earth to help people clean up their houses and prepare meals. balabala The topic is, children, if you met a snail girl, what would you say to her? I saw his son writing in small and almost legible fonts Auntie, please go quickly. My mother is coming back. 04 ﹨ ' ' Program 2 Daily Life No.2 What Just Happened My Naturally Silly Junior Brother is So Cute by happyshine ⺗⺗ I was chatting with my junior brother on QQ in the evening. I asked him to send him a picture of ppmm. The conversation was as follows. Do I want to see pictures of beautiful women? I just collected them Junior brother, no I me why Junior brother, I want to see senior brother’s photo Me, what’s good to see? I haven’t seen it. Me and the photos I took are too ugly Junior brother, I want to see you pick a good hairdo me ok Then I chose a photo from my trip and sent it to him I will delete it after reading it. No random sharing is allowed. Brother, oh Then the junior brother suddenly sent over the picture just now. What am I doing See next page 05 ﹨ ' ' Program 2 Daily Life No.2 What Just Happened My Naturally Silly Junior Brother is So Cute by happyshine ⺗⺗ Continued from previous page Why did I pass it to me again? I canceled image acceptance Junior brother, since you don’t let me post it randomly and ask me to delete it, then I will return the picture to you. Junior brother, I don’t want it anymore Me [expression] Hahaha, I was laughing so hard that I fainted from laughter instantly. So cute, so cute, hahaha Junior brother usually likes to act cute in front of me, but he is quite cute. What a natural idiot, haha 06 ﹨ ' ' Program 2 Daily Life No.3 My Dad's Nonsense by HITCAT ⺗⺗ My dad is so ridiculous 1 Yuba is a magic horse That year, my sister was in the fourth grade of elementary school and I was in the fourth grade of college. Our family bought a new house. During the big renovation, my parents had been debating whether to install a bathroom heater. My mom wanted to install it, but my dad thought it was Lao Shizi, my sister and I couldn’t bear it any longer and asked Dad, what is yuba? Dad is very Seriously, after the Xi'an Incident, Chiang Kai-shek wanted to take revenge on Yang Hucheng and chased him all the way. He was about to chase him. When he arrived, he was sent out of the country. Chiang Kai-shek was very depressed and patted his thighs, unable to stop. I wanted to stop this. My sister and I looked at each other and we both agreed. Petrified, haha 2. New customs of swans That year we went to my grandma’s house in the countryside to celebrate the New Year. I heard that grandma had three cats. Goose, my sister and I were very excited and ran to the yard to watch. Dad also came to accompany me. We watched for a while and he said seriously, now times have changed, so have the swans. We asked what the new customs were. Dad said they used to be In the past, monogamy was strictly observed, but now it is not so strict anymore. See next page 07 ﹨ ' ' Program 2 Daily Life No.3 My Dad's Nonsense by HITCAT ⺗⺗ Continued from previous page My sister and I looked at each other and were both petrified. 3.Who are those three people? My husband's family is in Changchun. There is a Changying Film Studio. There are probably three people in the factory wearing military uniforms. Then they have a local channel called Changying Channel, and they use the statues of those three people. My father arrived in Changchun when I got married. I watched TV with him and turned to the Changying channel to watch movies. He was looking at it seriously when he suddenly asked who those three people were. It took me a while to realize what he was asking. I really don’t know how to explain dad’s curiosity. 08 ﹨ ' ' Program 2 Daily Life No.4 It's so painful. I have to go to work again tomorrow. by rayrayzz by TIMaeUs ⺗⺗ My son also said the same thing before going to bed. He has to go to school again. I told him not to say it in front of his parents because both parents went to elementary school for six years, three years of junior high school, three years of middle school and four years of high school. University three As a result, he started crying before he finished listening. 09 ﹨ ' ' Program 3 No.1 Fate may be in the code comments byoikomi ⺗⺗ A former colleague at the company was low-key and not good at expressing himself. After leaving my job, I found that in the comments of a module he developed There is XXX, I love U XXX is a girl in the testing department. I was very touched and told her That girl later they got together. Later I found out about it in other modules he developed. This note, but the names of the test girls are all different. 10 ﹨ ' ' Program 3 No.2 Reason for resignation by Laysia ⺗⺗ Someone wrote that I have a bad stomach and can’t digest the cakes drawn by the boss. 11 ﹨ ' ' Show 3 No.3 Bank IT Department Joke by adding ⺗⺗ The IT department of a certain bank has a new boss. The vice president leads the new and old bosses to inspect each group of people and introduce them one by one. First of all Passing by the private banking project team, the vice president introduced that this was a colleague from private banking, and then online banking. The vice president of the group introduced that this is a colleague from online banking. Colleagues in the mobile banking team in the distance buried their heads in shame. 12 ﹨ ' 'Program 3 No.4 also hacked me as a science and engineering loser by swmtswmt ⺗⺗ If the lab report and your girlfriend fell into the water at the same time, which one would you save first? Reply It sounds like the person who is going to write the lab report has a girlfriend 13 ﹨ ' ' Program 4 Keeping Up with the Times No.1 Renamed by LilacWine ⺗⺗ Apple’s lawsuit against Proview ended with a large compensation for trademark infringement Then the iPad was renamed to iPad 14 ﹨ ' ' Program 4 Keeping Up with the Times No.2 The experience of a friend of mine who bought cut cakes and got away safely by Rumba ⺗⺗ A good friend of mine is also a golfer and runs very fast. He told us about one of his adventures. At that time, he was only a sophomore in college and he was young and ignorant and almost got into trouble. When I got off the bus at the west gate of Tsinghua University, I was hungry. I saw cut cakes for sale and wanted to try them. I won’t go into the process. I cut a piece and asked for 120 yuan. At that time, he probably only had that much for a week's living expenses. It is said that the buddy was looking around, and several cake sellers were staring at him with bright swords and slowly surrounding him. Come here, buddy, concentrate on your wits, point in the direction of Peking University, and yell, "Oh, why is there a fire?" The swordsmen looked back and saw that their friend ran away. He ran directly into the west gate of Tsinghua University and ran all the way back to the dormitory. Back then, both the 100 meters and 3,000 meters were champions. The 100 meters took about 12.5 seconds and the 3,000 meters took about 12.5 seconds. Within 12 minutes, he ran back to the dormitory and told us this out of breath. story 15 ﹨ ' ' Program 4 Keeping Up with the Times No.3 Jiaduobao by gxzy ⺗⺗ The Jiaduobao advertisement is 20 seconds long. In fact, it only expresses one sentence: Hello everyone, I am Wanglaoji. but i can't say 16 ﹨ ' ' Program 4 Keeping Up with the Times No.4 Jiaduobao by surwang ⺗⺗ Have you seen the Guangzhou Pharmaceutical version of Wong Lao Kat? It basically means: Hello everyone, I will be Wong Lao Kat from now on. 17 ﹨ ' ' Program 5 Two-puss Youth No. 1 Local Joke by SHUOT ⺗⺗ Go to the hospital for a physical examination. There are still two items left: dental and urine tests. The nurse who conducted the medical examination looked at my physical examination form and said, "Go and leave a urine and then go into the mouth." 18 ﹨ ' ' Program 5 Erotic Youth No.2 The Police Can't Afford to Hurt Me by weee ⺗⺗ Occasionally, I met my first love in college. Now she is a glorious people's policeman. She is still so beautiful. I looked at her crazily. I'm not married yet, and I don't have a girlfriend in my life. She smiled slightly and told me her ID number. 19 ﹨ ' ' Program 6 Old Debt No.1 I think back to when I took a basic computer knowledge class by ChangQiang ⺗⺗ It was really hard when I was a freshman because I had only seen computers on TV before going to college. The teacher wrote a symbol on the blackboard, which is the shape of "lying down" I searched twice on the keyboard and couldn't find it. 20 ﹨ ' ' Program 6 Old Debt No.2 My brother stole and laundered money when he was young by zhelan ⺗⺗ I was stupid when I was a child. I was two years younger than my brother and I was his follower. He stole money from the family and then took me out to play. Then he deliberately threw a dollar on the ground and pretended to let me If you find it, give it to him to buy candies. In this way, the source of income can be clearly explained. It was my younger brother who picked it up. Sometimes he throws it on the ground and I don't see it, so he calls me deliberately and says, "Look what's on the ground there." twenty one ﹨ ' ' Program 6 Old Debt No.3 Tell a True Joke by Beyond0921 ⺗⺗ When we were in high school, our class teacher found us playing games, reading novels, playing football, etc. They would ask us to do a handjob and then ask if it hurt. If it doesn’t hurt, just keep beating. If it hurts, just ask where it hurts. My classmates always say that my hands hurt, so the class teacher will When asked if there is any pain besides hand pain, we will usually say that it hurts, and the class teacher will ask why. Then we said that we didn't study hard and failed to live up to the expectations of teachers and parents. The head teacher was satisfied. I put it back after giving it a cracking education. This has become a routine until one time there was a bad guy and the class teacher asked him where it hurt and he said My hand hurt. The head teacher asked where else it hurt besides my hand. He said he felt distressed. The head teacher said why it hurts This guy said that because our fingers are connected and you hit my hand, of course I feel sorry for you. pain At that time, a dozen of us were standing in the head teacher's office, laughing together. Haha ha twenty two ﹨ ' ' Program 7 Academic Seminar No.1 Is it a problem for female teachers to dress fashionably? by DegoMaradona zz by Mozzie718 ⺗⺗ In our case sleeveless top is called half bag filter twenty three ﹨ ' ' Program 7 Academic Discussion No.2 Mizuki Joke Version of Jiao Ke's Joke Writing and Reply Flow Chart Haha you are so cute ⺗⺗ Yes Let me meet you. I graduated from the university next to Tsinghua University. Now working as an IT engineer Is she a socialite? Haha you are so cute Yes No Let’s get to know each other. I graduated from the university next to Tsinghua University. Now working as an IT engineer Jiao Ke writes jokes, is she MM? Yes. Defeat zt. Auntie. Let’s revolt and be clicked by zt. No Is it xinghe? Yes Toooooooooooooooldy was clicked by zt No Are you old? Yes Guijiao is really academic No Is it an academic post? Original by seizethetime No, it’s not funny. I was clicked by zt. ' ' Program 8 Seed Contestant No.1 Natural Little Red Diamond Jagbin You have to be careful when singing from now on. ⺗⺗ My undergraduate classmates reunited and sang in KTV. I suddenly discovered an amazing fact. Anyone who liked to sing any song back then often went to the place mentioned in the song. 1 The two of us played guitar and sang in Hotel California. Later, the person from our class went to the University of Southern California. After receiving various rejections from other universities, I had no choice but to go to the University of Southern California. 2 A girl studied Japanese with me back then. She sang Osaka しぐ in the Japanese class performance. れ As a result, I wanted to study in Tokyo, Japan but failed. After changing jobs, I went to study in Osaka for a year. Worked for two years 3 A boy sang at a certain art performance in Shanghai 1943 after the result I went to Shanghai to find a job. The key is that the company was originally from Beijing, but As soon as he reported in, he was arranged to go to the Shanghai office 4 A girl is from Ningxia. At that time, she loved singing Ningxia. As a result, she Returned to Ningxia after working in Beijing for 3 years 5 A boy likes Zhou Xun, so he sings "Watch the Sea" every day. Now he is in a certain place Offshore drilling platform complains about working 8 months a year, makes me want to vomit 6 A girl sang "Moscow has no eyes" with a girl from another department at the party. See next page 25 ﹨ ' ' Program 8 Seed Contestant No.1 Natural Little Red Diamond Jagbin You have to be careful when singing from now on. ⺗⺗ Continued from previous page Tears Later, this girl from our class went to work in Moscow with her boyfriend. 7 When the Qinghai-Tibet Railway was built, a girl from the department sang "Road to Heaven" in the singing competition, which shocked everyone. Later, this person went to a certain bureau of China Railway. Where is the Gemu Tunnel in Qinghai now? It is said that that tunnel More than 50 kilometers long So last night I started tossing and turning, recalling what songs I sang back then 26 ﹨ ' ' Program 8, seed player No.2, unlimited joke player yutourr Send two loving jokes ⺗⺗ Zhuge Liang went to Jiangdong and invited Zhou Yu to dinner. He pointed at a bowl of food and said, "Try the fish I cooked with my own hands." Jiang Zhou Yu replied in a low voice, "Hey, Liang Jiang" Lu Bu was good at bow and horse riding, and was known as the Flying General. When he was staying in Xiaopei, one day he showed off his martial arts in front of Liu Bei's brothers. Among thousands of troops, the way of power can come and go freely, but I, the flying general, saw Zhang Fei's face turn red. He replied softly, "I hate you, Buchan." 27 ﹨ ' ' Program 8 seed contestant No.3 was hated for marrying a cute lolita SundayMore My mother is also venomous ⺗⺗ The typhoon came to Shenzhen again. I leaned on a small parasol and walked home from the subway entrance. I got wet all over. Most of When I walked in, I complained to my dad. Dad, you didn’t even bring a bigger umbrella to pick me up when it rained so heavily. Dad said very coldly, it’s not me who would pick you up at your age! ! Got shot again! Before I could react, my mother stabbed me again. Alas, you call this a lack of support! 28 ﹨ ' ' Cast and crew ⺗⺗ Choose a shooting show and play with multiple actors Having and maintaining an improper relationship with a member of staff: FZD Whitewash, beautify the program and change individual items Interfering with the harmony of the show: percyshelley 29 ﹨ > , 0 ' 0 ^^ 0 0 0 0 If you joke year after year Maybe you'll watch the joke get old Maybe you'll watch the joke get old T195